{"id":1876,"date":"2010-04-02T02:35:30","date_gmt":"2010-04-02T02:35:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/?p=1876"},"modified":"2010-04-02T02:35:30","modified_gmt":"2010-04-02T02:35:30","slug":"being-honest-with-myself","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/2010\/04\/02\/being-honest-with-myself\/","title":{"rendered":"Being Honest With Myself"},"content":{"rendered":"

**Note – this is NOT an April Fool’s post**<\/p>\n

Ignorance is bliss.\u00a0 I’ve been a little too blissful lately.<\/p>\n

I also feel like a hypocrite.\u00a0 Here I am, with a mainly-healthy-living focused blog, dispensing advice like one of those little number stands at the butcher counter.\u00a0 However, I keep forgetting to call my OWN number.\u00a0 I have been giving out solid advice like:<\/p>\n

-If you are feeling guilt or unhappiness about something in your life, either make it a priority, or let it go.\u00a0 It’s not worth stressing about something you are not mentally ready to tackle.<\/p>\n

-Get in touch with your emotions.\u00a0 Figure out WHY you are continuing bad habits that you are trying to break.\u00a0 What’s in your head when you reach for that trigger food?\u00a0 THAT is what needs resolution.\u00a0 The problem, not just the symptoms.<\/p>\n

-The scale can be a great measuring tool if it is a) considered with respect – no excuses, it’s not lying to you even if it says something you don’t like and b) used as a measurement, not a mood-altering device.\u00a0 Also, definitely keep an eye on your favorite pair of jeans – if they start fitting differently, then something is definitely up.<\/p>\n

-Take little steps while you feel yourself starting to slip, rather than waiting for the ceiling to crash down on you and have to make a major head shift.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

So, am I following this?\u00a0 Not at all.\u00a0 The scale is reliably in the low 160s this week (after 2 weeks of completely sidestepping it because I did not want to deal with it).\u00a0 My favorite jeans are tight.\u00a0 I’m finding I’m going for the looser shirts.\u00a0 I’m putting things off until “Monday” or “next week”.\u00a0 I’ve been getting regularly grumpier with the scale and my situation yet I continue to overeat some days, eat junk, and not go back to what was working before – moderate exercise, tracking all my food, reduced calories, not so much protein, etc etc.<\/p>\n

It hit me today that I’ve developed some nasty habits and deviated from what was reliably helping me lose weight.\u00a0 I’ve got this sense of entitlement that since I’ve been through it for the last 3 years, since I’m an ATHLETE now, since I’m SO MUCH SMARTER and so superior, I don’t need these playthings anymore.\u00a0 I deserve to be able to take off these 5 (now closer to 10) to be comfortably in my maintenance range without too much discomfort and stress.\u00a0 I took my licks, I did my time in the trenches, I am smarter than needing silly things like calorie trackers and I have transcended beyond the scale mattering.<\/p>\n

But it does matter.\u00a0 Not in that “I need it to be a specific unrealistic number” way, but in the way that a year ago it was about 10 lbs less.\u00a0 And although I was going through a lot of mental issues about being stalled and it not being the 135 or whatever my goal was back then, I was pretty fit and happy there.\u00a0 I never thought 10 lbs would matter so much until I regained them.\u00a0 It sucks to look at things and think – hmmm, that looked so much better last summer.<\/p>\n

Not to say that I can’t make my excuses.\u00a0 Last year, I got married.\u00a0 That’s worth at LEAST 5 lbs of stress gain, right?\u00a0 I ran two half marathons and really found that distance running is a HORRIBLE way to lose weight.\u00a0 It’s a GREAT way to gain weight though…\u00a0 The 10 lbs has actually IMPROVED my performance, but I think what it is – I was eating WAY too little before to be training as hard as I was.\u00a0 Eating enough goes a long way to knocking out PRs.<\/p>\n

The problem is – I see this continuing.\u00a0 The weight is not falling off.\u00a0 The scale is continuing to inch up every few weeks.\u00a0 If I don’t take some time and tackle it now, I’ll be worrying about losing 25 lbs and NOTHING will fit.\u00a0 I’m not doing any distance races in the next few months.\u00a0 I’m scared to think what will happen if I start training again at 160 without losing anything – I’ll get to the starting line of the next race pushing 170…<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

So in being honest with myself, I am putting forth this plan.<\/p>\n

-Spend the rest of this week eating as healthfully as possible while finishing some last minute training and completing a duathalon, camping, and easter dinner with the folks.<\/p>\n

-Starting April 5th, I will be tracking my calories with Daily Burn<\/a>.\u00a0 I’m giving this a try as I like how it adds your workout calories burnt to each day’s consumption.\u00a0 I am going to try to eat at the bottom of the range it gives me on workout days (which will mean increasing my intake most days) and the top of the range on non-workout days.<\/p>\n

-I’m also going to change up the days I workout.\u00a0 This is going to invoke some pain but I want to give it a try.\u00a0 I generally eat more on a Saturday, so it is going to become a gym day instead of a rest day.\u00a0 If I go to Sunday brunch and eat 1000 calories?\u00a0 Guess what I’ll be doing later that day?\u00a0 Plans to go out for drinks on a weekday?\u00a0 Guess who will be dragging her ass out of bed super early for a run?\u00a0 Worst case scenario and I make an unplanned oops at night before bed?\u00a0 I make it right within 24 hours.\u00a0 Being diligent about tracking my calories should help – if I’m actually faced with the number and going beyond it, I’ll usually choose to wait it out instead of stuffing my face.<\/p>\n

-Write every bite.\u00a0 EVERY BITE.\u00a0 I usually add +100 calories per day for itty snacks, but this month, everything that goes in my mouth is getting tracked.\u00a0 Also – write how I FELT each time I ate to see if there are patterns or things I can discover.\u00a0 Maybe if I find I’m having a snack every day at 3 because I’m bored or figure out what I’m feeling when I get home from work and need to attack the kitchen, I can resolve the issue in a way that makes more sense.<\/p>\n

-Back off on the gung ho exercising a bit.\u00a0 As much as I’m terrified to lose this great running base I’ve built, something has to give.\u00a0 I know I can get it back.\u00a0 If I ran 14 miles once I can do it again.\u00a0 I’m still considering the numbers, but I’d like to limit myself to 2 super butt kicking workout days, 2 moderate days w\/strength training, and one fun type day (bike riding\/walk\/rock climbing\/skating\/etc).\u00a0 The 2 super intense days might even be too much.\u00a0 Again, still working on the logistics.\u00a0 I just need to realize that I cannot out-exercise my eating habits, and not even try.<\/p>\n

-Give myself this month to NOT be stronger and better and superior.\u00a0 To realize that I have mental shit still to get through.\u00a0 To realize that ANYONE can backslide.\u00a0 It can happen to you (me, the royal you, anyone).<\/p>\n

-Realize that I’m going to be hungry at times.\u00a0 Realize that I’m going to have to sometimes not eat things I want.\u00a0 Realize that it’s not forever.\u00a0 Realize that I am going to reevaluate at the end of the month to see if it’s worth it.<\/p>\n

So, starting next week, get ready for your regularly scheduled weight loss news and woes, before the channel was pre-empted by silly things like races and other nonsense. \ud83d\ude42\u00a0 Of course, after I post about the race!\u00a0 Has anyone done a duathalon before?\u00a0 Starting anew for April and want to share your plan?<\/p>\n

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**Note – this is NOT an April Fool’s post** Ignorance is bliss.\u00a0 I’ve been a little too blissful lately. I also feel like a hypocrite.\u00a0 Here I am, with a mainly-healthy-living focused blog, dispensing advice like one of those little number stands at the butcher counter.\u00a0 However, I keep forgetting to call my OWN number.\u00a0 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paUhDu-ug","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1876"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1876"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1876\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1880,"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1876\/revisions\/1880"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1876"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1876"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adjustedreality.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1876"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}