Adjusted Reality

One of those things I’d always get stuck on when I would decide to lose weight is healthy eating.  I have not been a “eat at home” type of gal, well, ever.  How shall I say this… the cooking that came out of my house was not exactly to my tastes.  I would not say my mother was a horrible cook (at least not in public…kidding), but she was working with a lot stacked against her in my eyes.

My parents are both huge carnivors, prefering huge chunks of meat, with a huge salad (that had things I hated back then like radishes and onions, plus I hated all salad dressings – why can’t I still hate dressing???), and some veggies and MAYBE a baked potato if we were lucky (with molly mcbutter, anyone remember that stuff?).  I have always preferred to have meat as a condiment, with a healthy dose of carbs and veggies as the main dish.  Plus, my dad had high blood pressure, so everything was low salt.  Now I know how to flavor without it, but I still see the challenge. So there I am, eating flavorless dry meat, slimy veggies, the bits out of the salad I could pick out, and the highlight of my meal was a baked potato with butter flakes sprinkled on top.

I remember the daily struggle culminated in a meal of liver and onions, with okra and eggplant on the side.  As a kid, there was literally NOTHING there I liked, and when forced to eat it, I spent the evening yakking over the garbage can (for drama only, it’s not as if I *couldn’t* eat it.  I just hated it).  Shortly after that, I was told that if I wanted something else for dinner, I had to make it.  I totally took my mom up on that.  When we went to the store I would have her buy me ramen, microwave dinners, cans of soup, anything chef boyardee, and canned tamales, and I would cook them.  She made me eat enough of the good stuff (veggies and forced some meat down my throat) but let me get the carbs they didn’t eat.  Which is probably a good thing for a kid that pretty much was active constantly.

Since I didn’t like what came out of the kitchen, I never really learned any recipes from my mom.  Since we were such different animals, there was no point.  At eighteen, I was thrust out into the world of making my own damn food, and I pretty much relied on things in cans or boxes, frozen veggies, and fast food and/or coffee shops.  I think I gained/lost/gained about 15 lbs until the last year of college, where I pretty much ate bar food or Applebees (because I worked there and it was 50% off).  Couple that with binge drinking and moving my partying from the dance floor to a bar stool, it was not pretty.  But, enough about my 21st haze of a year…the point I’m trying to make here is twofold.  First, I didn’t gain an excessive amount of weight in the first 3 years without eating at home, like, ever.  Second, if I, queen of the prepackaged meal, can learn to cook healthy food, so can you.

This revelation is very recent.  Two years ago, Marie Calendars prepared most of my meals if I didn’t go out.  It took a commitment to eating better, a kitchen I had more than 1 square of prep space, and being so sick of everything packaged and frozen that I almost would rather stop eating than make another Lean Cuisine Chicken Alfredo.  Only the first is necessary.  I don’t actually suggest #3 and you can still work with #2 unless you’re looking for excuses.

To start, don’t aim too high.  Take the packaged pasta roni you’re eyeing for dinner, buy a bag of frozen veggies and some precooked chicken.  Voila, you’ve got two fairly balanced meals – actually, and the calorie count isn’t that horrid.  Aim to add extra veggies to EVERYTHING, the packaged stuff NEVER has enough.  If you must have that can of chicken and stars soup, balance it out with a big leafy salad with lots of veggies and a protien source like beans or turkey pepperoni.  Love mac and cheese?  Add a mess of frozen veggies, a can of tuna, some onions and celery, and instead of a thousand plus calorie bowl of orange flavored carb, you’ve got 2-3 helpings with some better staying power.  If you can only do one thing, I suggest adding 2 servings of frozen veggies to whatever your eating.

Then, once you realize, hmmm, maybe I could make this better on my own, you’ll start branching out.  I started making my own sandwiches, wraps, and salads instead of ordering them – sounds easy, but it was a start.  After a while, the world was my oyster and I made my own tortilla pizzas and calzones, stir frys (though Zliten took those over and rocks them better than I can), soups, tacos, and burritos.  Then, we found the wonders of the BBQ and now dine on fish, chicken, kabobs…it’s amazing how much BETTER meat is on a grill!  Soon, you’ll never open a package again.  Yeah…right, like that could happen (for me at least).

This week, we have a particularly “package-y” menu, so it’s a perfect week to showcase!  Today for dinner, manwhiches!  That is extra lean ground beef, lo cal sourdough bread, manwhich can, fat free cheese, and a mess-ton of frozen veggies on the side.  Tomorrow, I’m taking a package of lipton fettucini alfredo, adding a chicken breast, and another ton of veggies.  Wednesday, we’re splitting a package of stouffers lasagna (the 3 serving size), and adding a huge salad w/a lo cal bread to sop it up.  Thursday, we’ve got some beef stew/pan pot roast thing, adding veggies and a big ol’ salad as well.  Friday is more of a home cooked kinda thing, but it’s so easy – fish tacos and garlic black beans.  Take 2 frozen costco tilapia filets, cook in pan with garlic, add hot sauce, cilantro, olives, lettuce, sour cream, and cheese to a corn tortilla, and feel good in your belly.

The beauty of these meals?  Nothing is over 500 calories, and they’re way easy to make.  Next time I talk about recipes I’ll get into some of the more complicated stuff, but from the start, I just wanted to stress that ANYONE can eat healthier with very little effort or knowledge in the kitchen.  The reason I’ve let this post sit for so long?  I never remember to let the food stay in it’s cooked/not eaten stages long enough to take pictures.  Ah well.  There’s always next time.

Haven’t done one of these for a while, so it’s a random Friday!

1.  Proud of myself: had to stay late at work for babysitting the build (the collection of new stuff that we are adding to the game) duty.  Between stuff I had to do, I made it down to the gym for a 30 minute interval and leg strength session, returned to work for a bit, then when I could, closed my office door and did a ab and arm workout.  I owe myself 10 minutes of DDR but all in all, I think I did good.  Not proud of myself: came home and had  bottle of wine for dinner, which resulted in splitting a can of store brand spaghetti with Zliten at 2am.  Oh well, you can’t win them all.

2.  I decided, fuck the weight requirement (was going to wait until 160), and went clothes shopping anyway on black Friday.  And I’m glad I did, because now, I fit squarely into size 10s, so I have been making progress.  I haven’t seen size 10s since I was in high school.  I know sizes are a little inflated, but I remember 2 years ago walking into the same store (Target) and buying size 24.  Now I have new brown and black pants, a billion new sweaters and long sleeved shirts in lots of colors (though I failed at finding anything in orange, yellow, or purple, which made me sad).  Of all places, we walked into walmart and I went through the clothes just on a lark, and found, on clearance, awesome suit jackets and pants.  I snagged a black jacket, pinstripe jacket and pants (and seriously, these are probably the most comfortable pants I own now), and a red dress shirt for like 40 bucks.  Now, Zliten and I have matching suits (his idea, actually) we can wear.  I think people might vomit with cuteness poisoning though.

3.  All of you people in the northern-lands I’m sure have soooo much sympathy for me, but damn, is it summer yet?  Last night it got down to the 30s and this morning on the drive to work it was in the low 40s.  I miss being able to sit out on my patio at night in a tank top, instead of being bundled up in a coat, scarf, and gloves trying not to freeze to death.  Give me 95 and humid any day instead of this crap.

4.  I spent some time reading gamer news this week, and I realized how bored I am with it all.  All the games I was excited for came out already and without the week of laziness over Christmas to get into a game since Scroogie McBoss man is making us work this year, I just don’t have time to really get into anything anyway.  However, I am really anticipating 2 things – we are getting an xbox 360 for Christmas (ok, so today) from Zliten’s parents, and I’m really excited to finally play Viva Pinata and Fable (yes, I know I’m late to the party, but at least my games are cheap!).  I’m also counting the days until February 19th when The Sims 3 launches, and I am going to potentially become a hermit for a while.  I guess I shouldn’t throw away my geek card just yet.

5.  I am excited about this, a new BattleStar Galactica spinoff.  I’m sure it will be as well written as the series, and hopefully as “edge-of-your-seat” tense…but I’m a little questionable about the premise (being a prequel, and being more of a drama than a sci-fi).  I am excited for this as well, though I’m not sure if Stargate as an IP is being stretched a little thin.  I’m hopeful though – and will gobble up willingly anything stargate.  Except the cartoon.  That shit was wack, yo.  Speaking of all things Stargate, my thoughts go out to the staff at Cheyenne Mountain Studios, who are now still at work on their game on their 22nd unpaid day, just trying to get the game finished because of funding issues.  That’s dedication.  I hope your game is great, and you’re rewarded in the end with big moneyhats. (thx Zliten for the tip on that)

Have a great weekend!

Tuesday afternoon, we hit up the Olive Garden for lunch, for belly warming minestrone (and half a bowl of zuppa toscani) and metric ass-tons of salad and a breadstick (*cough*andaquarter*cough*), and then parted ways (I do believe the parenthetical things are why I’m still stuck in the mid-160’s, but I digress).  I believe the Zliten was on his way to Chez Target but decided to stop at a cute little reptile shop called Zookeeper we check out occasionally and drool over the leezards.

Before I go further, let me submit this picture of our current pet, Lump.

A sexy looking lizard, right?  Yes, but he’s also a meanie of a reptile.  When we picked him up at the pet store, he bit Zliten so hard he drew blood.  We thought that just meant he was a good, healthy, and feisty lizard and with time he would grow to love us.  After getting him home, we read up on Schneider Skinks.  The blue tongue versions are lovely, cuddly reptiles who will just curl up on your belly on the couch with you while watch TV.  These guys are mean and described as, for the most part, “look at, not touch” pets, though some say you can socialize them.

Over 3.5 years, we’ve been able to calm him down to where he doesn’t bite Zliten if his hand is in the cage and occasionally will be amenable to be picked up for about 60 seconds before squirming if we’re lucky.  Lump loves chasing crickets, he got especially happy when we moved to Austin and started feeding him Texas sized crickets he could fight with for days.  He also loves watching sci fi, actually, anything with good bass, and was absolutely mesmerized by Dance Dance Revolution when Zliten held him up to the screen once while I was playing.  It’s probably the longest he’s even been calm outside of his cage.

As endearing as that is, he spends most of his time buried under the sand (hence the name, Lump).  And that gleam in his eye?  That is the desire for man-flesh.  Much as we tried, he will never be able to hang out with us unless there are 4 glass walls around him.  So, we’ve talked about getting another lizard, one that’s a little friendlier.  Many times, we almost brought home blue tongues but they are so expensive (200 bucks), and they always put them in pairs that cuddle, so we couldn’t bear to be the ones who seperated them.  We’ve kept an eye on Craigslist for people that needed to get rid of reptiles, but nothing ever looked promising.

Then this gal came along…

To continue with the tale above, Zliten walked into Zookeeper and found this pretty ‘guana there.  She’d just been sold to the store a few days ago by a family who couldn’t keep her because their apartment was too small.  She looked strong and healthy and when he picked her up, she crawled up onto his shoulder and just hung out there, and didn’t want to leave.  Apparently, someone else was checking her out, so he messaged me a picture, I said yeah, and he paid and went to go get her an enclosure.  I do say she’s living quite nicely.

She seems a little timid, but soooo mellow.  No tail thwapping, no hissing, nothing.  When I pick her up, she’ll just settle wherever I place her and stay there.  She also seemed mesmerized by the TV and last night when I tried to put my face between her and the tube, she lifted her head like, “um, I can’t SEE now”.   So cute.  Hopefully she’ll get a little more comfortable and start exploring more when we let her out (be careful what you wish for, right), but she seems to like us well enough, and she is eating and drinking so she’s at least settled enough for now.

Lump’s been pretty much hidden under the sand for 2 days.  I think he’s jealous (or it’s winter and he hibernates more than normal).  Maybe it will inspire him to be nicer.  Yeah, that would be the day.

Now, we just need a name.  We’ve been calling her Iguana Donna but I don’t think that will stick.  Any suggestions from the interwebs?

So after the love-fest that was November, I just have to go and wreck a good thing and change it up.  Rather drastically even.  Why would I do this?  Because, dammit, I want to freaking lose some weight already.  I made peace with my body wanting some time to stabilize, and I’ve definitely not stopped losing inches (hello there, size 10 pants, haven’t seen you in at LEAST 10 years if not more…but we were reacquainted last weekend!) but I’m sick of 160-something on the scale.  It’s time to get closer to the 150s, and while I don’t expect epic progress this month, I would just like to see some new numbers, ya know, below 165.  It’s time to shake the snowglobe and present December’s Plan!

Change #1 – going back to tracking food, mostly.

I am so happy I took last month off, because I know I can, I won’t miss tracking when I don’t have to do it anymore, and I was able to maintain my weight (more specifically gain on vacation and lose after – and not really trying) without keeping a count.  If you’re familiar with the Hacker’s Diet, I think my EAT watch is actually fixed after just over a year.  However, I think it will be VITAL if I want to lose, to get back to counting what goes in my mouth.

The exception to the rule is going to be one day per week, I am going to not track.  I’m going to aim for it to always be a hard workout day.  Reason being – I loved that “more fuel for the fire” feeling, and I think if I have one day a week I can eat more, it will help me not feel bleh the rest of the week.  The goal of this day is not a “cheat day” (I’m not going to start with bacon, pancakes, and hashbrowns, eat a lunch of a burger and fries, and then have tacos for dinner and have desert at each meal), I am going to just going to give myself permission to eat more (hopefully) healthful food.  I’m only anticipating 2-3 Holiday parties before Christmas itself (which is just my parents and some lasagna, which I can fully handle), so it won’t be as hectic as last year, but I have the option to not make myself crazy trying to figure out how to incorporate those into a calorie-restricted diet if I so choose.

Change #2 – 4 Day Work(out) Weeks

I’ve always felt like I’d love 4 day work weeks.  I figure I spend a lot of time getting up, getting dressed and ready, prepping my things, driving to work, walking to and from the parking lot, driving home, putting away the stuff I brought, and generally decompressing and getting settled in at home.  It doesn’t sound like much, but in my quest to be as efficient with my responsible time as possible (meaning time not spent at home, on the couch, being a slacker), it puts a thorn in my side.  I am up at 8am and do nothing but responsible until about 8pm, when I’m done with my shower after the gym. I work for 9 hours a day (with a lunch) and workout for about 1.5 max.  That’s 1.5 hours disappearing into the ether!  Such inefficiency offends me!

I also spend some of that time collecting my workout items and clothes, packing them, putting them on, driving to and from the gym, showering, and changing into normal person clothes and generally de-sweatting myself.  Since my employer will probably be the LAST company EVER to change over to 4 day work weeks, why not try 4 day workout weeks on my own?  Maybe I can save myself a little time, which I can then spend enjoying myself?  Besides results in terms of weight loss and progress there, I’m going to track if I feel like I have more time.

The difference is that while working is easy to just incorporate the 2 extra hours per day in the workdays, the logistics are a little different with workouts.  First, I can only physically do so much per day so it’s not as if I can do an interval run AND a long run in one day.  Second, some things I do at home, some things I do at the gym, so while I think there is just going to have to be a day or 2 where I do both, I’m not sure how I feel about that.  The last thing I want to do after a good gym workout is a DDR session.  I’m already home, I should be done, dag nabit.  So here is what I have to work with:

-1 hour long run

-2 x 30 minute interval sessions

-2 full body strength sessions

-2 x 20 minute yoga sessions

-2 x 40 minute DDR sessions

The rules are as normal – cannot work the same body part 2 consecutive days, cannot do 2 runs on the same day, every day must end with a stretch, either yoga or just a stretch session tacked on the end.  I am going to add two provisions this time – that 20 minutes of DDR can be converted to Cybil the arc trainer, and everything must be done in 4 days.  So in day by day plans, this is what it looks like:

Day 1: 30 mins intervals, full body strength

Day 2: 60 mins DDR, yoga

Day 3: long run, yoga

Day 4: 30 mins intervals, full body strength

The only thing missing is either 20 mins DDR or 20 mins Cybil.  So I will leave it up in the air and either plan 10 mins at the end of day 1 and 3, and get up one morning and do 20 mins of DDR before work.  Knowing me, I will chose Cybil.  I am going to attempt to do Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturdays, but as usual, these are flexible as long as they happen.

Change #3 – It is not ok not to lose weight this month!

October and November I gave myself a break after the trainwreck that was September.  But I’ve been stalled now scale-wise for 3 months!  I’ve refueled!  I’ve stabilized!  I’ve tried being nice to my body!  It is now time to start chipping away again to get closer to my goal.  1500 calories on weekdays, maximum, and try for closer to 1200.  I would have liked to hope that I really and truly wasn’t eating enough to lose weight, but I just don’t think it’s the case outside of Quix’s magical fairlyland where sugar plums count as fruit. I’m much happier eating more, but happy doesn’t move the scale.  I just have to remember that last month, I felt how it was to maintain, and it was good.  Just a few short months of…ummm….less happiness and I can go back to that.  While I don’t believe in extreme measures to lose weight, I can probably, after over a year of good habits, restrict calories a little more (but still safely, of course) to get there and be ok.

I told myself last month it was ok to maintain, and it was.  I’m very pleased with it.  I don’t harbor any secret resentment towards myself.  It was not the all-out frustration I had in September, and not the quiet sulking of October, it was actual contentment.  But this month I’d like to take things back up a notch and continue down to 150-ville before I get too comfortable here in my size 10s.  I look in the mirror and think HOT, generally, but I can certainly see a few things I’d like to have shrink more before I’m done, that I can’t see shrinking without the scale going down just a bit more.  At this point, I don’t care how slow it goes, as long as it starts going again!  My goal is to lose 3 lbs this month.  I would like to end the year below 162.

How will I fare? Well, yesterday I hit the gym and did 30 minute intervals, 10 mins on Cybil, and a full body strength session and while I felt like I was at the gym for a long time, I didn’t poop out in the middle of a workout and still felt like I had just about as much time as if I would have done a normal session.  How will the rest of the month go?  Stick around to find out!

Since it’s a cold Austin Monday and I just have a feeling that things are going to explode soon today, let’s just get right to it.

The Plan was:

• Foodwise – not track my calories for the entire 4 weeks.  Keep the same goal as always, to eat 6 servings of fruits and veggies per day, up the protien and lower the fat a bit, and put the least amount possible of anything chocolate, fried, or generally high in calories in my cakehole.  Just without putting it into the tracker.
• Exercisewise – the general plan is 2 days of DDR + yoga, 2 days of intervals + weights, and 1 long run.  But I have full permission to deviate and do whatever I want (as long as it’s a decent calorie burn).
• Mentalwise – to nurture my body and mind through what’s already shaping up to be a helluva month.  Give myself permission to maintain at the weight I’m at now if that’s what it needs to do, but also to shed unwanted weight if it’s ready to do so.
• Measurewise – I plan to get a tape measure and do a before pic this week and after pic on December 1st.  I want to see if I am making any progress beyond the scale.

The results are in:

• Foodwise, I did not track one day.  Not one bite or one calorie.  I did make a brief mention of what I ate on the cruise but that was more for posterity than accountability.
• Exercisewise, I sort of gave myself permission to do what I wanted, but guess what?  I stuck to pretty much the same schedule/things I planned on – running intervals/full body strength 2 days, DDR/yoga 2 days, and a long run 1 day.
• Mentalwise, things calmed down a bit after the first week of crazy and being on vacation the last half of the month pretty much didn’t hurt my headspace.  I almost feel like things might just work out ok.
• Measurewise, I failed.  I still don’t own a tape measure and didn’t take an official before and after pic.

Overall, I loved what I did this month and felt I succeeded in a great way.  I started the month around 165, and weighed in yesterday at 165.  During the month, not only did I give myself the rope to hang myself with by not tracking food and having a free-floating exercise plan, but also prepared for disaster with 2 hellacious weeks at work, a cruise (where the average person gains 1.5 lbs PER DAY on the boat), and Thanksgiving with a 4 star chef who’s middle name has to be either Butter or Sugar.  This month, while I would have loved the surprise, I did not expect to lose weight.  Frankly, as long as I was under 170, I was not going to bitch.  This month was practice maintainence, and in the event of actual maintainence, I would have rocked it!

This is a huge confidence booster.  I’ve always been scared of what will happen when I hit the point where I stopped losing weight and started just trying to keep it off.  Obviously, I’ve never done a good job at it, every time I’ve lost some weight and started feeling fabulous, it’s been less than a year before I gained at least that much, if not more, back.  I was also sorta freaked that I’d have to track my food for the rest of my life.  Though it is comforting to be in control and know exactly what I have/can eat when trying to be overbearingly mathematical about it all, I didn’t want to live like that forever.  I can say I didn’t miss it a bit after a few days, and I will be able to let it go when it’s time.  Exercise – I think after 16 consecutive months of regular workouts, it will be hard for me to just one day stop doing it.  I’m just not worried there.

The one thing I really liked about this month is I can tell I was eating more, overall, and not gaining weight.  Sure, the scale hated me right after vacation but the rest of the month it didn’t really vary much.  I felt like there was a lot of fuel in the fire when I worked out instead of running on fumes some days.  I’m really, really looking forward to when I can do that all the time.  However, to lose weight, I must obviously take in less calories, so it can’t last just yet.

All in all, rousing success.  I can’t wait until life is like November.  What’s on tap for December?  Back tomorrow to let you know!