Adjusted Reality

“Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.” – Mark Twain

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Hot-tober

I’m just a girl, standing in front of a weather forecast, wishing it would finally be fall.

I am also a girl, standing in front of a mirror, realizing she needs to make a hair appointment…

Looks like I’ll get my wish tomorrow but holy heck, it’s been a hell of a hot-tober. I’m super glad I’m not marathon training – just 25k training, which is also trails and mostly walking, so that’s not as bad, but still feels bad to be sweating your ass off on Oct 25th when it climbs into the 90s mid-day on the hike.

Besides whinging about the weather, let’s catch up, shall we?

At least McKinney Falls is pretty even if it’s hot.

In terms of being of sound mind and body-

I got a female things checkup, and all looks good. Much better than the last few years. While I prefer to solve things without medication, and I’m still figuring out how to be productive and competitive without harnessing the power of anger, I do appreciate being a calmer human being even outside of my pills taking care of the actual problems they were intended to solve. I have a preventative regular checkup and a preventative dermatologist skin check scheduled in January as well. Yay, adulting.

Speaking of adulting, the last few times I’ve visited the doctor or dentist, I’ve had inconsistent (and sometimes high) blood pressure readings. I wrote it off as white-coat syndrome, but I figured I should do some due-diligence on it to make sure. And… it’s kind of inconsistent at home too. Sometimes normal, sometimes a few points over normal, and one day it was super high.

Let’s go back to the place where I REALLY don’t want to have to take medication if I don’t have to. So – my goal over the next 3 months is to bring my blood pressure back down to consistently normal and I spent some time researching how to do that. This made me take a real good look at the thing I’m most willing to change – and seems like will make the most impact – my diet. I started thinking about it over the summer, but I didn’t really follow through. If I can be honest with myself, my diet has gone from super high quality to pretty poor over the last 5 years and maybe just calorie counting isn’t enough to stay healthy and feel good.

These days are great but they need to be the VERY OCCASIONAL exception to the rule…

So, here we go:

  • SALT. Holy crap, I eat a lot of salt already and my tastebuds are calibrated for me to want to add more. Totally works when I’m crushing long distance training in the heat. Doesn’t really right now. I started looking in despair about how to do a low salt diet and Joel suggested what his doctor suggested – start with not adding any. Goal is to not add salt to anything that’s already processed. If I make a potato into wedges in the air fryer – I can add (a little) salt. I can’t add salt to a frozen dinner that’s already 50% of my daily value. I’m not proud to admit I do this, but… I do.
  • DIET QUALITY. I used to eat really healthy. Like, so many veggies, some fruits, whole grains, lean protein, some nuts/legumes, all the good stuff. I even tracked it, which made me generally eat very healthy so I could accommodate some splurges (which decreased my points) and still stay above a certain range. I can’t find the damn scale, so I’m going to START with more general goals:
    • Reintroduce fruit into my life. This week, I’ve got watermelon (which increases potassium, which is good for blood pressure) and blueberries (I don’t eat much in the blue/purple categories these days). If I don’t have a smoothie in the morning, I need some fruit in my afternoon snack. 1-2 servings a day
    • All the veggies. Salad for breakfast (unless I have a smoothie, then salad as an afternoon snack). Extra veggies with the prepared healthy meals (e.g. extra frozen peas with my cacio y pepe Snap Kitchen pasta). Fewer prepared meals so I can get different vegetables (e.g. making my own chicken pasta with spinach and asparagus vs the same peas in my cacio every time).
    • Eating my processed low calorie foods (hot pockets and frozen meals) very infrequently and not repurchasing them once they are gone.
  • Aim for 1500 calories 5x week, up to 2000 calories 1x week, up to 2500 calories 1x week (long day). There’s very few days I get fewer than 300 activity calories (maybe 1-2 days a week when I just take a short walk) spreading out the deficit will help me not have to starve those days. 1500 is doable when I’m eating healthy with no splurges. 2000 is doable with a small splurge. 2500 is very doable for days I do 1000+ calorie long workouts and if I need to stretch it a little I will (e.g. I burned 1500 on my 14 mile hike last weekend I may stretch that to like 2700).

I’ll try this for November and see how things are going. Besides the BP normalization, I’d really like to come into the end of January at least under the “obese” range (179.9 for me). I’m much fitter than the average bear and carry way more muscle so I’m smaller size-wise, but it’s still that convo with the doctor that I’d love to not have to have. So, goals! Let’s go!

Let’s ignore the fact that we’re heading into the holiday season and I’m going on an 8-day cruise. We’ll make it work. I’ve done it before!

Spookywalk season is a great time for activity

Where I’m doing great is moving my ass. My doctor asked, “are you exercising” and I just said “yes” but um… yeah, I’m walking like 9+ hours a week and running 2-3x week and lifting weights 3x week. I think that qualifies.

Hikes and runs will just continue to progress over the next few months to be longer, so hopefully that will help in the above quest. This is the easy part for me, especially now that I’m done with triathlon for the year and can get out the door on my own two feet (either moving quickly for a run or slower for a walk) there’s no real friction, unlike prepping for riding bikes or getting to a pool to swim. And… it’s finally starting to be temperate enough for walks or even runs whenever (not just at crack of dawn or after dark) so that will help so, so, so much.

I wish now this showed walking, because that’s a lot of my activity these days, but check the hour totals on the weeks:

My worst week was 9.5h activity, best two were 11.5h. It’s like back when I was half ironman training, but less intense. Which is great for not eating like I’m a trash compactor.

Goals this month:

  • I did DECENTLY at weights but I do see two weeks where I only did 2x week not 3. There should be no excuse in November as long as I time leg day far enough away from long hikes (oops last week, killer leg day Fri + 14 mile hike Sat = Sunday NOFUNDAY). And I’m going to try to get to the gym for at least two of them per week. I can do it at home, but my workouts stagnate and I get better quality workouts at the gym.
  • We are doing a 25k (15.6 mile) race (let’s call it a hike) on Nov 16! Goal again is to simply complete it, maybe do a little bit of running but mostly hiking.
  • Start working my 2-3x week runs (let’s be fair, it’s looking like 2x week above) up in distance a bit. 3 miles is easy before work, but I’d like to extend one of them longer at least every other week.

Longer term, we are targeting a 50k (31.1 miles OMG) in March, and we need to get both our mileage and speed up (we won’t complete it in the time allotted if we just walk it). So, over the winter we’ll increase our road running distance to 13-15 miles (also, I’d like to race at least one half marathon if not some other road races), increase our long hikes to… maybe marathon distance (I need to look up a 50k training plan) and incorporate run/walk intervals into some hikes. But, for now, just want to get through the race and keep slowly building distance in both runs and hikes and start smashing the two together.

And I get to spend tons of time out here doing this stuff so no complaints!

On the non-health related stuffs… I cleaned out a drawer. Yay! I did a thing. It’s truly on Joel when he wants to start his projects so I’m not pushing him. But I’m trying to pick one small thing in my stuff to clean out each week so I can make small incremental progress there. I also feel like I adulted by doing doctor stuff and trying to fix my diet so I’m not going to put a crapton of pressure on myself to do more.

In the book, I’m at 33k words (so 10k in the last month), but some are notes. I haven’t had that much focused quiet time to write lately, either due to schedule stuffs or Joel wanting to do other stuffs or just not having the brain to do stuffs when I have the time. It’s ok. I’d like to, if nothing else, make all the words I have into first pass writing instead of notes. December will be a great time to make words, and maybe I won’t have my whole draft of book 3 done by end of year, but I shouldn’t be that far off either!

I had a month where I was just unenthused with photo editing. I pretty much took a month off and just posted spookywalk photos with crappy insta filters. My goal is the same as October, get through random spring stuff and Seattle before I leave for vacay, so I’m only one vacation behind!

I didn’t pick up my guitar. Ah well. Maybe next month. Also, I asked Joel to fix my/his/my electric since something is wrong with it. It’s one of those little speedbumps (I have two other guitars) keeping me from doing things.

So, November:

  • Eat more veggies and fruit, no adding salt to salty things (and take my blood pressure consistently)
  • Complete a 25k and increase distance on long walks and runs, maintain 3x week weights
  • Get my notes into real words
  • Edit some photos
  • Clean out a few small things or help Joel clean out his bigger things.

Now that the weather is going to start cooperating, I feel like almost anything is possible!

Phoning it in and Kerrville Tri 2024

Consider this the most phoned in update ever, so I can continue to get one update per month out. Let’s go!

I spent most of August and early September eating and drinking my way through Vermont, Austin, Seattle, and Sacramento. I sorta kinda tracked my food, sometimes. To no one’s surprise, after I started weighing daily, I’ve noticed I’ve gained a few lbs this summer. I’m not upset about it. But I’m now I’m trying to reverse the trajectory – I am actively tracking each day, and this week I’ll really start to adhere to my limits.

October temperatures changing means getting out to walk more is much easier and also, it’s possible to do outdoor workouts that aren’t first thing in the morning, so I have high hopes my activity level will increase. I also plan to back off the prepared meals a bit. These meals are around 500 calories each (give or take), and with a 200-300 calorie breakfast, that’s what I’m trying to eat in a day before additional activity calories. That makes me cranky. That doesn’t satisfy me. I can make much more filling meals (read: tons of veggies) for fewer calories and can add a giant salad back to my afternoon snack rotation, so I should feel fuller and achieve more of a deficit without the grumps (or at least as many of them).

As for activity, not terrible minus a few hiccups:

I traveled for work (and then family stuff) Aug 29-Sept 4, so workout time was limited. I felt like I was coming down with something after we got home (and half the people we were around got sick too). My tactic was to aggressively sleep, which actually worked, and normal activity resumed the week after.

I feel reasonably good enough about my race prep the rest of the month though. I got two open water swims, both felt great (if not fast). I got two outdoor brick workouts on the TT bike, and the first one was a little dodgy but the second was great.

How did it go? This is what I posted on socials this weekend:

I slept very poorly the night before but my good sleeps this week and caffeine made up for it. That and the cooler weather (50s to start, OMG) meant I was raring to go!

The warm water felt sooooo good after freezing my butt off. I took it comfy and slow, finding feet to draft behind when I could. About the same pace as last year (2:15/100) but my heart rate was so much lower out of the water. I just felt refreshed and warmed up. I was able to jog up the hill and transition was almost a minute quicker than last year.

I have been wondering why my outdoor bike times have been slower recently and this week I realized I still had the emergency Gatorskin tires I bought in 2022 the day before the X-50 because my race ones fell apart and that’s all they had. Oops. This is what happens when Triathlon is an afterthought. My bike also hasn’t been serviced since then so this goes on the winter to do list.

Regardless, I had a very nice, smooth, no stress bike (albeit growling a bit at the speeds) where I felt super comfortable even on the crowded course and only sucked a little wind rolling uphill both laps. I finished right around last year’s time (18mph, 46 and change). T2 also went a little faster than last year and I definitely felt more ready to run.

My legs didn’t feel awesome but I let them get under me and warm up until I was clipping along decently. Passed @jetsers going the other way and he was looking strong too! Yay! With my lack of any speed training, I felt ill-equipped to really tuck into the pain cave, I don’t really know my limits right now and I’d rather finish strong than blow up. I tried to push the last half mile but I didn’t have much of a kick and finished pretty much exactly how I did last year – 32 and some change for 3.2 miles.

1:40:30 last year. 1:40:28 this year. I’m nothing if not consistent and hey, 2 second faster!

1:39:11 would have gotten me 3rd in my age group, I got 8th/22 instead. A properly serviced bike with race tires and/or a little bit more oomph on the run will get me there. Maybe next year!

A few days later, I feel the same way. Now that they don’t put age groups on the back of our calves, I have no idea who I need to run down so it’s back to competing with myself. That’s probably better for me in my current mindset and focus. I’m truly happy it went as well as it did, and I think 10% more focus on triathlon next year (a little more specific training and taking care of my gear) will help me close the gap. Instead of limping into and/or after the race like previous years, I was able to wake up feeling great the next morning and go on a 6-mile hike. Does that mean I could have pushed harder? You betcha. Does that make me sad? Not really. I don’t know where my edges are, and until I explore that in practice, I don’t want to extend beyond them and blow up.

Outside of triathlon, I’ve kept up with strength work since I’ve been back from Vermont. It’s mostly at home and I feel like I’m maintaining vs GAINS but that’s totally fine for my focus and the effort I’ve been putting in. In October, we’ll resume our gym adventures, longer hikes, longer runs, but I also want to remember that indoor bikes are a great way to get activity when I need something time-efficient for activity and/or when the weather sucks.

We did some small adulting tasks this month. Does cleaning out the beer fridge count? Well, we did that. We also finally replaced our dryer after 2 months of air drying our clothes. Next month, we have some bigger stuff to do:

  • Joel’s dresser drawer broke the night before we went to Vermont. It’s still just sitting in the closet, making pretty much all of it unusable. We need to see if we can fix it, if not, purchase a replacement. This entails a lot of unearthing of said surfaces due to stacked shelves so it’s a bit of a project.
  • We need to start part 2 of the great office move/situation. We need to clean out both offices of non-office things, figure out how to get a murphy bed installed so it CAN be a place to sleep very occasionally but is normally usable space, and a lot of other logistics. This is the big fall project.

As for fun stuff

  • I’ve finished editing the two camping trips earlier in the year and am next moving onto the next two small projects (random stuff from earlier in the year hikes and Seattle/Sacramento). That will leave me with JUST Vermont to do in later months.
  • I am making great (if not consistent) progress in my book. I’m about 22k words already, even though I haven’t had time to work on it each weekend. This one is about where in the campaign I went from “eating snacks and cracking jokes” to “Captial I” Invested once the campaign went to a setting that was familiar to me (and made my brain start turning in a lot of different ways in different aspects of my life).

I’d like to set a goal to pick up my guitar this month again before I forget how to play it. I haven’t been painting and while I’d be sad about that, writing is taking most of my hobby time, and that’s OK! I shouldn’t chide myself for how I spend my productive hobby time (as long as I’m spending it doing something creative vs just doomscrolling). I’m behind on travel blogs but if it’s between that and being motivated to do book stuff, I’ll always do book stuff.

So, October!

  • Track food, weigh, and actually stay under my calorie range. Trying to get back to cooking more so I can accomplish this better than small/not-filling healthy prepared meals. This is actually my biggest focus this month so I’m bolding it!
  • Lift (back to the gym!), hike, run, stairstepper, and bike when it sounds fun/convenient for exercise. Go do some longer hikes this month to assess if we can reasonably be ready for a 25k next month.
  • Progress on the adulting list (Joel’s dresser, start working on the great two-office set up project)
  • Write, pick up my guitar and tune it, and keep editing photos

Augtober and other temporal anomalies that make little sense

Hanging on to my goal of at least one post a month, just barely.

Almost two months ago and yet somehow also yesterday

But, we here, even though time feels like it’s racing past faster than ever. So, let’s catch up.

July – she was a strange one. It had lovely points, like Krause Springs, multiple long hikes at McKinney falls, and cooler weather than normal so I was still very happy running and walking in the outdoors. Normally by July it’s full-on summer (read: 105, feels like the center of the sun) but it waited an extra month and I am thankful as heck for it.

However, I also had a week where I was sure I was getting sick (and turned out to just be bad mold allergies), and I was dealing with an interpersonal issue that was really frustrating me (not anyone close to me or family). A bit of vagueblogging here – but you know when you’re so frustrated with someone you consider doing what’s necessary to remove them from your life? Of course, the easy way is just to ghost them, but when that isn’t really possible without consequences you don’t like, you have to step up and wear the big girl pants and deal with it. July was about feeling the frustration come to a boiling point, and finally dealing with it.

The effects there included some over-indulgences. I finally fell off tracking instead of just tracking late. I stopped tracking daily on July 19, and I picked it back up, ironically enough, on August 19. So, a full month off. I have also been VERY lax about tracking my weight, I shouldn’t even hazard a guess, but if I did, I think I may be 1lb up since the beginning of July. With what I’ve been putting in my stomach, I don’t think it’s unfair. I earned it. 😛

Here’s the activity calendar. Note there’s a LOOOOOOT of walking here that doesn’t show up except in the totals. Most days have a walk, in fact, I hit a 1-mile per day 30-day walking streak over vacation. Yay me!

I didn’t do the BEST job at keeping up with weights (more like 2x week than 3 on average) and you can easily see the week I thought I was getting sick (July 22) where I didn’t run but once. I mean, I went seven miles because it was a nice cool day and I felt good again, but I was doing a better job earlier in the month to be more consistent. Still, 7-11 hours of activity per week is not shabby.

Let’s all laugh at the idea of adulting in the hot summer during a month when we were particularly stressed out and move on. Oh, wait, I think we cleaned off the spare bed in Joel’s new office. That’s something! Check!

I was able to finish Krause Springs photo editing the day before we left for Vermont, but I absolutely did not touch my book in the month of July. The Muse was a little apprehensive about my mood and decided she would maintain her distance. I did read a heck of a lot, tearing through a 9 book Superhero series called “Wearing the Cape”. I started the first one on the July 4th camping trip and finished the last one the first day of our Vermont trip August 1st. We also were engrossed with all the Olympic coverage when we weren’t traveling, so a lot of my leisure time went there.

Let’s talk about August, since it was sort of a turning point. A transition, if you will. And I have yet another trip to go on so it will probably be a little bit before I get back here so consider this a 2-in-1 monthly recap.

I spent my summer vacation eating and walking and I have no regerts.

I had a very lovely Vermont trip. The cooler weather was amazing. The hikes were gorgeous. The towns were adorable. There’s nothing more than I love getting out into nature and also exploring a town on my own two feet, and we did so so so much of that. I will certainly make a post about this one – I’m wildly behind on my travel blogging and I may start skipping some of the shorter camping trips to places I’ve been before – but Vermont was worth it, even if I get to it months later.

I did actually try to track a little starting at the beginning of vacation. I made it four days, and I was very much over every day. I could have made better choices, but Stowe, Vermont seems to focus on really good “bar food” so I had lots of sandwiches and burgers and fries and beers and the like. To say we stayed active was an understatement with about 30 hours/60 miles from Aug 1-10 alone of tracked activities, but I’m pretty sure I still outpaced my burn with my consumption.

Gorgeous day. Slippery rocks. Much ow descending.

That also is considering Tuesday, Aug 6th, we climbed a mountain and I sprained my ankle as we started the descent. That’s a story for another post, but thankfully it still held my weight (was just a bit unstable) and I made it down on my own accord and was able to walk after. The next day, it was pretty darn sore so I was able to slowly walk to lunch and dinner (about 2 miles total), but that was it. After that, it felt better, but only had about 3-4 miles per day on it before it got really sore during the rest of vacation. Different than the 10+ miles most days that we were used to, but we made it work.

It was perfect timing that my training focus when I returned from vacay shifted to triathlon for the next 7 weeks. On Monday, August 12, I started a bike streak (since I couldn’t run yet). I stopped that bike streak 5 days later when I forgot you needed to build up saddle toughness to bike every day. I haven’t been on a bike in months. My arse really hurt! However, I’m at 105 miles biked in 2 weeks – hitting 5 days per week. Four days on the trainer each week at 30-40 mins a pop, and one slightly longer outdoor bike on the weekend. My ankle is healed enough that I actually ran my first mile off the bike today – in 9:19! I haven’t run that fast in forever.

Triathlon training is happening. Proof here.

Swimming has been a challenge. Last week, we packed for swimming on the way home on Tuesday. That didn’t happen. Nor Wednesday or Thursday. It took us ’til Saturday to actually make it to the gym (but hey, one swim down, and somehow it was faster than normal after roughly 6 months of not swimming?). This week, I resolved to do better. I walked to the closer gym with the crappy pool Monday. It was closed – someone threw a rock through the window and there was broken glass. They assured me it would be open the next day. I figured it would take a bit longer and gave them ’til Thursday, where it still wasn’t fixed. I did weights and the stair stepper instead, so it wasn’t a wasted trip, but still frustrating when the process of just getting to a swim is a big chore. Drove to the nice gym again today, and wouldn’t you know it? I had another lovely swim in my favorite pool, it’s just a level of oomph I can’t find to get there during the weekdays. If I can make it to the pool once a week, I guess it’s better than nothing.

I’m back to 3x week strength and plan to maintain that even if I’m mostly doing it at home vs the gym for a bit. I plan to get back to sessions with the Squat Witch a little in Sept and hit it hard in October and beyond.

In September, I need to hit some race prep milestones:

  • I need to ride my TT bike outside. I’d like to do this twice, in the kit I plan to wear, with a brick run at the end. I’m super skittish on this bike since I’m out of practice so it needs to be early in the morning on a weekend with no traffic.
  • I need to open water swim with my swim skin. Ideally twice as well.
  • Not race prep, necessarily, but get some faster intervals in on the run (now that I’m sure my ankle can handle it)

And, after September 28th, we shall go back to hiking, running, and strength as the primary workouts to train for fall trail races and winter road races. I DO see the value in a 30-minute trainer ride that takes 35 mins total to execute, instead of a 1 hour+ walk to burn the same number of calories. In lovely weather, when I’m not imminently training for a race, and I have the time? The walk will win hands down. If time or weather is a factor? Biking is fine. I get to watch a Bloodbowl game. It’s not the torture I had built it up to in my mind since I’d been away from it for so long.

Just a few words on calorie input/output – I’m back to tracking and that’s going… okay. I will try to do it while I’m away, but not stress about it, and then when I’m back from my trip, I’ll actually work on balancing the bank account with daily activity and what goes in my mouth. Like, daily. Instead of catching up a few days later.

Adulting will resume later. This is about the time of year it falls off and that’s ok. We accomplished the big important things and when things slow down and it gets cooler closer to the holidays, we usually do another big push. I have projects I’d like to get done and I need to schedule some checkup type doctor appointments, but that’s a fall problem.

I am very pleased to report that I’ve started Book #3! And… in 2 writing sessions, I’ve knocked out over 12k words. This one is just flowing well, and who knows – I might actually meet my goal to have it done by the end of the year. I haven’t made final first-pass edits to Book #2 and that’s okay, I’ll save it for when I get stalled out on this one and need a way to distract myself.

And with hiking scenery like this, it’s worth editing the photos eventually!

I haven’t been motivated to paint anything, and I have just barely started the project to organize and edit all the smaller trips and day hikes from earlier this year. I realized the latter is because my bluetooth mouse has become unreliable and you just CAN’T edit photos without one. So, another one is on the way, and perhaps that will pick up soon.

So, September. What’s up, ninth month of the year (how so fast?)?

  • Survive/enjoy the upcoming work trip
  • Track food, like, for reals, to reinstate the habit and weigh myself to get some current metrics
  • Triathlon training and race prep and go race with joy and fire!
  • Keep chugging along through Book #3’s crappy first draft
  • Work on photo editing the little projects

Hopefully in September’s recap, I will have better metrics to show and not just excuses. By October, I have no excuse to have excuses… hopefully.

Holy, what? It’s July already?

Sometimes the minutes go slow…

(smiling because I’m NOT on the torture device…)

…especially when they’re on the Stairmaster. If you ever wanted to make 10 minutes last forever, there you go. But the months go fast. I can’t believe we’re over halfway through 2024 and almost halfway through July! I definitely am not quite exactly where I planned to be 6 months ago but also, the view ain’t too bad, so I’ll call it even.

How about them sporty things?

I’d say with my renewed goals (running, walking, weights as priority, biking and swimming on the back burner) I did pretty great!

  • Running: 40 miles/10 hours
  • Walking: 60 miles/21.5 hours
  • Weights: 12 sessions/6.5 hours
  • Other Cardio: 6 sessions/1.5 hours (mostly the dreaded stairmaster…)
  • Biking: once/7.5 miles (in between runs for triple bricks)
  • Swimming: hahahhahaah ok, moving on.

This month I’m giving myself one more of these run/hike/walk/lift/stairmaster at the gym months before I do a short sprint triathlon training block and race Kerrville. I signed up last night. When I reframed it as not the thing I need to do all year long but the thing I was going to do from mid-August through the end of September as a training block to mix things up a little bit, it sounded fun instead of tedious. So, we’re going to get out for a swim a week, do some outdoor rides and bricks, and go see what the 45-49 age group has in store.

After the race, I plan to return to run/hike/walk/lift/stairmaster, pushing miles on foot to get stronger and racing road and trail races over the fall and winter. Which I definitely am. We repeated the same course as the race last month whilst camping and my climbing pace on the big hill that almost killed me was much better. I could keep up with Joel. Screw you/thank you Stairmaster, my frienemy.

Speaking of frienemy, shall I introduce you to the scale? Spoiler alert, July isn’t looking much better either.

Insert my inane whining about how it’s hard and age 45 feels like it upped the degree of difficulty to lose weight and its unfair I burn 3000 extra calories a week and there’s no way I shouldn’t be seeing better progress with how I normally eat. And then I realize that I’m tracking food days later (right now I’m 5 days behind, oops) with probably significant levels of error to the point where it’s not worth doing the “add the calories up” thing I’ve done in months past. Hot pockets have become a normal breakfast food, we’re taking a bit of a break from prepared healthy meals so there’s been more random frozen and air fryer food even if I have been able to keep takeout and restaurant meals to a minimum and many other sins and failings in my life right now. So, I’ll stay true to my word and not be pissed I didn’t lose weight because I didn’t try really hard.

(scenes from a random Wednesday off when it was cooler and rainy last month)

So, this month, I want to eat better quality foods that make me feel good. Moar veggies. Whole grains and stick-to-your-ribs carbs even if it doesn’t seem like it means anything. Vary my proteins – I’m on all chicken all the time pretty much rn, so I want to eat more seafood and find ways that I can get a little more lean beef in my diet since Joel isn’t eating it but once a week anymore. All in all, sort of half-assing it intentionally and doing the best I can to at least not gain weight.

Adulting… yeah. Adulting didn’t happen except SOME of the box pile in the garage. I did manage to do a little closet cleanout to help unearth the pile o stuff on the side of Joel’s new office, but I definitely didn’t do the painting and hardware thing I wanted to do and I just don’t have high hopes for it this month either. For some reason (the reason is probably the heat!), I’m much less productive here in the summer.

July, I did/will do some other things. I finally got all my financial stuff in one place and confirmed I’m still able to retire at 55. 9 years and 8 months to go! We planned and booked trips and things and the rest of the year looks like:

  • Vermont in August. Let’s go hike somewhere cooler and gorgeous!
  • PAX in Seattle and quick trip to Sacramento to visit the aunt in law in September
  • Kerrville Triathlon end of September
  • (planned) Great Springs Trail Half Marathon October 12
  • (planned) McKinney Falls Camping? November
  • (planned) Wild Hare 25k Trail Race November 15
  • Carribean Cruise December

Busy/fun/exciting stuff!

Fun stuff is going well. I finished my second revision pass on my book, Joel read it, and I now have feedback to incorporate. I’ve shared with a few more people too, but since most people don’t read multiple books per week on a good week like we do, I’m sure it will take a bit to get more. The goal is to finish the feedback this month and then next month start on… book 3!

I finished the Seattle photos, I finished the Arch photos, and now I decided since I’m going to work on the trip I just took (Krause Springs) and see if I can get that done by the time I’m off to the next adventure (not likely).

So, like, second half of the month.

  • Eat good food, track stuff even if its later, don’t gain weight
  • 3xweek weights, run, hike, walk, torture device (stairmaster)
  • Krause Springs photo editing
  • Incorporate book feedback and prepare for book 3
  • Don’t let the turkeys get me down
  • Get ready to go climb mountains!

Sounds fun, let’s go.

Shifting Focus and Tejas Trail Running Festival

It’s no surprise to anyone who’s been reading this blog I’ve been in a bit of a rut.

I mean, it’s not all bad. I’m running, I’m hiking, I’m training strength regularly and upping weights. Sometimes, I get on my bike when there’s not another better option. Logging 8-12 hours a week of activity isn’t shabby especially when I can scroll back to 2020-2022 and see my average at 3-5. I’m not fast at anything right now, but I feel pretty fit when I can go run 4-5 miles on a random Tuesday if the weather isn’t trying to kill me with oppressive heat and go hike for 3-4 hours every other weekend and still walk the next day. In the five weeks around May, I went ~133 miles and only about 8 of those were cycling, so MUCH ambulation at varying paces.

I’ve logged my food every day, to some level of accuracy. I haven’t been mainlining deep fried bacon wrapped cheese sticks dipped in ranch (sometimes, a cheese stick or two in the air fryer with yogurt dressing… but you know what I mean) or other disgusting food in mass quantities. I’m just not being as diligent as I have been in the past. I’m not losing weight, but I’m not gaining. Admittedly, I’m not trying really hard. I want to want to try really hard, but if I’m being honest, I’m more motivated to whine about it than do it. And that’s not fun for anyone involved.

Work is being work right now. I’ve oscillated in my seventeen years of employment with my current company between feeling true gratitude someone would pay me for the cool things I get to do and leaving each day not sure if I want to come back for the next. I’m somewhere in the middle right now. This is okay – it’s actually quite excellent for work/life balance after quite a few years being megamaniacal about all the things. However, I do kind of live for being ALL IN on something in my life and this isn’t it right now. It feels like that recovery period after the Ironman, where you can’t fathom how you were riding bikes for 100+ miles and doing 20 mile runs even though you were totally doing that ish every weekend before the race. Now, it’s difficult enough to do a light 30-minute jog and you’re still giving your bike the side-eye as it sits alone in the corner of your room, where it’s been since the race weeks ago.

Looking at my life from the outside, one would see me as a highly successful, motivated, well-rounded and really productive person. And it’s not that I’m not – but none of these things have the SPARK right now. They’re not THE THING that wakes me up in the morning, excited to go make progress on some new, exciting, scary, challenging goal. I need at least one of those in my life or I feel adrift.

So, I went and walked/ran in the woods on June 8th for over 5 hours in 90+ degree heat, completing a half-marathon distance in like 4.5 hours (5.25 hours with stops) with 1400 feet of ascent. And this is just the beginning, hopefully.

I’ve always been a little ultramarathon-curious, but it’s never really come up to the top of the bucket list as it’s – in theory – the antithesis to the training I did. I’ve been focused all these years on getting faster and playing to my strengths (flat races in cool weather). Heat ruins my mood really quickly. I suck at running hills. Up is hard and demoralizing for me. I am not the most graceful with uneven surfaces, and that’s putting it kindly. Earlier in my life, the idea of going for a 3 hour walk in the heat ON PURPOSE FOR FUN sounded terrible (still does, but I’m choosing the suck so it feels… better?). Running trails would leave me frustrated with the slow time/pace so I stuck to roads to soothe my little ego.

So, it’s time to attack some of my weaknesses and pursue something new. Time to suck at something new for a while so I can get better at it. I’d like to progress towards traveling 50 kilometers on my own two feet in one day. I want to do the Grand Canyon Rim to Rim in one day. And I have no qualms personifying this meme…

I would be perfectly happy to wander in nature for 10+ hours while gorging on whatever food is available (chips now fuel my long workouts, not gels) and collect my medal at the end or limp to the North Lodge and die, or whatever,

That takes care of the training goal. It’s a long hill to climb (literally!), something new to learn and sink my teeth into. New gear, new races, DFL finishes will be with pride as I learn to be a badass in the wilderness. It will be really fun and challenging and difficult, but I’m looking forward to figuring out how to not die on the ascents (and tiptoe down the descents) and be more capable and confident running on rocks and managing all the craziness that comes along with long days again (without having to deal with all the swimming and biking gear). I still have love for triathlon (maybe just… long distance relationship status right now) and have some hope this will shore up some of my weaknesses there as well. And I’m guessing this will all translate to some really nice gains once it gets cooler and I do some road running races as well.

Even if not, I’m going to try something new that seems like it will fit pretty well with my lifestyle right now. I need a different type of pain cave right now. Let’s effing go.

Now, there’s the scale. I ended April at 183.7. I also ended May at 183.7. I think I may need to shift my focus here as well. I still need to track, otherwise I get… forgive the pun… way off track. But I think I need to give myself the month, hell, maybe even the summer, and stop half-assed trying to lose weight. Either I need to focus on it or not. And I’ve proven to myself that it’s not in the cards right now, for whatever reason. So, this month, my goal is simply not to gain weight and try to enjoy healthy food again (read: ALL THE VEGGIES).

I’ve kinda stopped the constant meal delivery of Snap and Factor because we were just going UGH at them. I have more than a few in the freezer because they were about to expire. I want to focus on varying my diet, making some delicious yummy food that’s not the same 10 meals over and over, and getting a lot of veggies, lean protein, and good carbs that fill me up and make me happy. This week we have some grilled al pastor for tacos and enchiladas and grilled chicken for pitas, wraps, salads, or whatever. Hopefully, that fixes that rut.

In terms of hobbies, the only one I’m really trying to push on is my book, since I’m still really motivated there. I have finished my edit pass, and ready to read it, I’m just giving it a little space first so I can be more critical. After that, I think it’s time to start book 3 (maybe next month?). I also woke up in the middle of the night at one point and put together some notes (let’s not call it an outline yet) for the whole series, so at least dream me isn’t in a rut and trying to be productive!

And, adulting gets to go last. I adulted enough in April/early May with the bathroom. Mostly everything is put back and organized. I haven’t touched paint or hardware but maybe I can get that done this month. We did get Joel squeezed into the guest room and a nice new adjustable desk, and we’ll probably keep it there for now. It’s been pretty cool to be able to leave the gaming stuff up on the dining room table and we may play some longer games (a turn or two a night) because of it! Also, the pool is open and lovely. So, mostly done what I meant to do.

June is already 1/3 done, but here’s what I’d like to do with the rest of it:

  • Keep the activity up and not be super picky on what I’m doing, just that I’m doing it. Weights 3x week. Try for at least 2 runs per week. Triple brick workouts sometimes because I can stand the heat better in 1-2 mile chunks. Lots of walks. Long hikes every other weekend or so. We’ll get more serious about this closer to the next race (end of Sept if I race a triathlon, mid-October if I skip it) but for now, move my arse and lift heavy things.
  • Track my food but not be as limiting (or at least pretend to try to be limiting). Use a little meal delivery as some easy options but get back to cooking healthy food atop piles of veggies like I used to eat more often.
  • Read my book, revise one more time based on my/Joel’s feedback, and start book 3!
  • Finish Seattle editing (yeah, my softball didn’t even happen) and start the Arch
  • Hardware/paint on doors, and break down the box pile in the garage for adulting

I think it sounds doable! Let’s see what happens, shall we?

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