Communication – Then and Now

This, which is a very fine read on it’s own got me thinking, but on a slightly different subject.  It’s something that I’ve discussed with friends on some levels, but I’d like to put it out to the internet as well.  As we’ve become more technologically inclined, levels of communication have definitely changed and evolved from 15 years ago.

Case in point: when I was 15 years old, the options available to me to communicate with someone was to either see them in person, call them, stick a note in their locker, or write them a letter and mail it.  Considering most of my friends and I went to the same school, it wasn’t much trouble to see someone in person if I wanted to speak with them.  Most of the people I took time to communicate or share with were at least close acquaintances that knew me pretty well.  It was pretty typical to spend a good amount of time that I was not hanging out with one or a group of people either on the phone with a local friend, on the phone with a friend from Chi-town, where I used to live, or writing a personal letter to them.

Fast forward to college, around 10 years ago (Did I really say that?  I am getting so old).  My time was a bit more in demand then trying to do school, work, and theatre, and the internets had become a presence in my life, so the breakdown was a little different.  The most important people got alone time – usually meals or coffee or whatnot.  This was pretty much only for my best friends and boyfriend at the time.  Then, there was group interaction – going out to a party or hanging out with a group at coffee or whatnot.  There were still phone calls and texts, but usually dedicated to the same people that were on the “alone time” level unless they were super short utilitarian ones (making plans to go out, asking a quick question, etc).   I had pretty much stopped writing letters in favor of emails.  At that time, they were still usually personal ones, I didn’t graduate to the bulk “here’s how I’m doing” letters for another few years.  This is also about the time in my life where my friends weren’t only back in Chicago or near me – people had scattered to many different towns and places.

Now, I’ve got friends even more scattered.  I’ve got people I could consider good friends in Chicago, San Diego, Reno, New York, Denver, LA, Portland, Phoenix, Lexington, and I’m sure quite a few other places I’m forgetting.  Seeing them face to face is right out.  I wish I could take that many vacations per year, but yeah, totally not happening.  I wish I could be better about calling these people on the phone to chat and catch up, but the only people I ever call are my parents.  I used to send out nice long personal emails, but I don’t even have time for that anymore.

Beyond the group of local friends I see on a weekly/monthly basis and my parents, my answer to anyone that wants to stay in touch is not my phone number and address, but first my facebook and twitter info, and second my IM and email address.  I have been lucky to have met a seriously large amount of cool people in my life and I’ve always wanted to keep in touch with as many of them as I can.  The disconnect is between my want and my level of effort – I just don’t have the time and energy to spend on the phone catching up or out to dinner with a different old friend each night.  I guess it would be different if I lived in the same area all my life, but I’ve been a midwesterner, a desert gambler gal, an attitude-clad so-cal-ian, and now a southern hippie.  I’ve not traveled like some of the army brat folks I know, but I’ve been around.

I am in love with sites like Facebook/Twitter/Live Journal/etc – as well as the ability to have my own blog.  I think it’s super keen to be able to tell everyone at once today that “Leah is feeling rebellious.  Eff you, I won’t do what you tell me.  Ok, I probably will but I’ll grumble about it.”  And past coworkers, friends from middle school, former gymnastics teammates, and current friends of friends can comment about how dorky I truly am.  It helps to feel close to people who there is no way you could keep in touch with otherwise.  Some folks I’ve actually become close to *because* of the sites, people who were acquaintences but feel more like friends now.  It’s like back when I played MMOs, but with less 2am corpse runs and 6 hour raids.  Bonus!

I’m sure you can argue the downsides, but I’m not really feeling that right now.  I’m just happy that I can know what everyone’s doing and what’s one everyone’s mind whenever they feel like sharing.

What do you think about communication nowadays?  Hate that a personal message for some people is a text?  Love that you can meet and keep in touch with people over the intertubes?