Adjusted Reality

“Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.” – Mark Twain

That’ll Do Pig

There is really no place like home.  It wasn’t always that way.  As a kid, the last day of vacation was always so sad to me.  I’d have to be dragged kicking and screaming from the pool the last day.  People at summer camp would get homesick, and I never understood that, I’d just get sad the last day when everyone else got excited to go home.  It’s not that home was bad at all, it’s just that I loved different.  I loved new experiences.  I loved having a break from the norm.  If I would have caught a break to do it earlier in life, I might have easily taken a job with tons of traveling and been happy as a clam.

However, that train left the station years ago.  It took the left track and I took the right, and now I loathe being away for too long from my leezards, my couch, my bed, my kitchen… my house in general.  If I have to take a trip without my Zliten, forget about it.  I’m counting the hours until my plane lands. It’s sick and sappy and perhaps pukeworthy, but it’s almost pointless to go away without him unless I have to, because I barely enjoy it, even after 11 years of being together.

The last few years, it’s also a desire to be back into a routine.  I come back from vacation craving veggies like an addict in rehab, and after shaking off the tireds, enjoy resuming the hardcore workouts.  This time I did definitely keep up the activity the two days we weren’t driving all day, but usually it’s just a lot of walking.  And since I follow the ethos of letting go on vacation, it usually just barely (if at all) makes up for the revelry and merriment.  I’m ok with that because we go away a few times a year, and it really hits home how good I feel when I eat healthy.  Seriously – when I get grumpy because I can’t let go and eat anything I want, I remember how I feel after a few days on vacation.  It’s worth it, but I am always so happy to be back to healthy food.

So to tally up all the so bad/so good things I remember eating, there was pizza, homemade waffles, fries, a bowl of frosted flakes, oreo cookie frozen custard, movie theatre nachos (complete with the fake orange “cheese food” that is so low quality it tastes like plastic but even still has a soft spot in my heart), a few types of wedding cake, crackers and dip, and much more.  Not to mention for-reals moonshine, dequiris, beer, and copius amounts of whiskey.  Against that, I ran 3 miles, ellipticaled 2 miles, did 20 mins weights, swam over half a mile, and walked about 7 miles total.  On the way there and back I stuck to subway because damned if I was going to splurge calories on fast food nastiness.  So, it wasn’t all bad.

It was totally worth it to see my two great friends get married.  They both looked awesome, everything about the wedding was country and adorable and just felt like it was done up with love.  They both lost it multiple times during the ceremony and it was just fantastic.  Not to mention the “nuptial picnic” after out in the middle of nowhere.  There was a taco buffet, lots of homemade appetizers, a daquiri machine and kegs of beer, five different types of wedding cake.  We played bingo (and won an inflatable monkey and some other prizes cuz we were lucky!) and watched kids light off hours worth of fireworks (no one even lost any limbs or had to be rushed to the hospital), drunk Elvis came out, we drank moonshine, and I convinced the groom to do a kegstand.  By doing a kegstand myself.  Don’t judge.  Do notice the good form, my gymnastics coaches would be proud.

This week, it’s back to the grindstone.  Monday was a too big breakfast (two plates of fruit, half a bagel, a piece of peanut butter and honey toast), subway turkey, and then veggies and fiber pasta w/chicken and spicy sauce for dinner, so fairly healthy, but I did have some sweets in there.  As of yesterday, I’ve actually decided to do a mini sugar detox – no deserts for as long as I can stand it.  I had a fortune cookie, but that totally doesn’t count.  After dinner I had a bunch of frozen fruit instead of a random sweet, so it’s off to a good start.

I’m almost considering putting off weighing one more week – I’m not entirely sure I want to know what I weigh 6 days from now.  We shall see. Last week by the numbers is pretty much useless, but I’ll list out my workouts.

Monday: 6.75 miles running (725 calories burnt)
Tuesday: Arc trainer for 30 mins, 45 mins weights (600 calories burnt)
Wednesday: 12 mile bike ride, 5 mile run (1075 calories burnt)
Thursday: off (packing)
Friday: off (driving)
Saturday: 3 mile run, 2 miles eliptical, 800m swim, 20 mins weights, 1 mile walk (1200 calories burnt)
Sunday: 5.75 mile walking (500 calories burnt)

4100 calories burnt.  585 on average per day.  Considering I rolled at a significant deficit the first 4 days of the week, I’d have had to done like 3500 calories per day on vacay to really and truly gain weight.  I might have gotten close one day, but not all of them.  So I’ll say – that’ll do pig, that’ll do.

Here’s the plan for this week, which is already underway…

Monday: off (driving)
Tuesday: Arc trainer for 45 (600 calories)
Wednesday: 12 mile bike ride, 5 mile run (1075 calories)
Thursday: weights + somesortacardio for about 30 mins (500 calories)
Friday: run of some sorta TBD (10k, sprints, hills)  (500-750 calories)
Saturday: weights, walking adventure (600-1o million  calories)
Sunday: off or something mellow-active like a bike ride or walk or some such (who knows)

Kind of a TBD week.  I felt really super exhausted yesterday after work and almost took a rest day, but a mellow workout did me right, I do believe.  Today, I have crazy planned, but if I’m still not feeling 100% I might ratchet down to just mildly insane.  It’s going to be a hard week at work, and I’ve got lots to do at home, so we shall see.

Hope you all had a great 4th…or may the 4th be with you? 🙂


Packing In The Packing


Something’s Gotta Give


  1. Your kegstand is excellent. Definitively excellent.

  2. Wait. You have leezards? I will forgive you for not telling me sooner if you post a pic of the inflatable monkey. Why didn’t I think of opting for inflatable kids? Cheaper – no food, no daycare, etc etc.

  3. I love you can have a blast and not stress out too much re: food/drinks, but balance it out with exercise and good eating right after.

    Also, yes, I’ll agree with Felice, that keg stand is bad ass for sure.

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