Adjusted Reality

Tag: triathlon Page 12 of 37

Total Randomness

On February 26, 2018

Whew, ok, the last post gave me the willies. Talkin’ about humans and feelings and stuff.

Things that do not impress me – arm day noodles and also feels like 30 degrees. C’mon winter. You had your time. Spring please!

Today, I’m going to go with total randomness.

Last week was the first week in a long time that I have barely noticed my heel being cranky. I was feeling some pretty big feelings about this earlier in the month, but I’m hoping between rest and dutifully wearing my insoles, its healed. Not to mention about missing out on some killer running weather, I’ve missed most of the season where I actually wear clothes that look somewhat put together since it’s not 200000 degrees outside. Why bother looking nice if I have to complete the ensemble with running shoes? Oh well. I can be a fashion police fugitive if it means a year of injury free training and racing. I’m willing to make that sacrifice, so it’s been a winter of mostly the same five hoodies and two pairs of jeans every week.

Speaking of things that should set a good tone for the upcoming season… I am really really really really really really enjoying heavy weights (as much as I like to make faces while doing it on the Instagrams). I forget how much I actually like taking the time to lift. It’s just as achievement based as run/bike/swim, it’s super fun to keep those weights numbers going up, and you really and truly can’t overdo it. I’m doing one hour three times per week, and I can see that’s pretty much the top limit on what’s useful. Unlike riding my bike, which I want to do as much as humanly possible until I collapse into a puddle of quivering goo.

I’m starting week #4 today and my gains right now are probably more based on remembering how to actually do the exercises (muscle memory) than actual strength. However, even if it’s totally subconscious, I do feel more sturdy and a little more definition in the marshmallow fluff all over my body. If I could eat a little less, I’m sure it would help but that’s a whole ‘nother thing. I’m hoping to stick with the lifting more throughout season – 1-2 times a week. Honestly, coach-me thinks lifting probably does me more good than a random 3-5 mile jog, but it’s hard to convince athlete-me of that when the thing I compete at is swim bike RUN.

A day of happy. Bikes, weights, unicorns fighting robots, and good food.

Obviously, since I’m just mandating that I do “cardio” 3xweek for 30 minutes, I’ve been riding my bike and that’s it. Because of the heel shenanigans, I decided to lay off the running, but I am looking forward to getting back to it in the next week or so. I’ve had some plans to hit the pool but then it will be cold or rainy or the sky will be blue or the day will end in -y and I do something else instead. Hopping on the trainer takes so little prep time. Swimming for 30 minutes is like a 75 minute commitment. I know I’ll get back to it when I need to, I’ll whine about being slow for a month, and then things will go back to normal.

Here’s a weird thing – my bike rides have actually gotten really GOOD lately. Over the last week, I’ve noticed that I’m putting in less effort to get the same power numbers and speed. I’ve also been having less trouble waking up in the morning, and actually have been able to hit the workouts before work fairly regularly. Ladies and gentlemen, I think I have hit the mythical place I haven’t seen in years: BEING RESTED! It actually feels great!

It’s like all the things are coming together. Weights make me feel great. Shorter bouts of cardio with some intensity is awesome. The other key is that I’m handling some shit in my personal life a little better which is a little tough for my BRAIN but fantastic for my body.

As an endurance athlete, I’m used to constantly feeling beat up. I’m actually more comfortable feeling a little tired and sore. During season, the punishment is mostly from workouts and a little fun when I can fit it in. During offseason, it’s adventures and enjoying the freedom to have beers more often and not being the best at sleeping and of course junk food because I don’t have to care what I feel like when I wake up in the morning because I’m not training.

I mean, after you earn an “Official Badass” mug you have to break it in at least once, right?

This has been a weird situation where I’m not training hard but also under a strict embargo to not eat and drink like an asshole because I’d really like to see the other mythical place called: AT RACE WEIGHT. It’s quite weird. Usually I have a reason not to go home and have glasses of whiskey like, “I have to get up and train for two hours tomorrow and you know how miserable that feels”. Now, I’m having to come home to “Yes you CAN have beers tonight but should you?” It’s like college, where all of a sudden you have freedom to do whatever, but then this big goal in the distance, and your job is to not to eff it all up by pursuing short term pleasure instead of long term goals too often.

It’s been a weird handful of weeks trying to sort this one out. I figured this would be a little easier, but it’s the end of February (two months later) and I’m still struggling with this one at times. In my quest to analyze what my malfunction is here, I’ve come up with a few things. Alcohol is fun. Just like Sleepytime Tea and my book and a square or two of dark chocolate now mean bed, a glass of whiskey means it’s an evening off goals and to dos, and it’s time to relax and unwind.

I’ve also learned if I let myself sit on the couch being bored watching bad TV surfing the net, I’m more likely to want to have a glass of wine to make that more exciting. If I do something engaging, like beading, playing games, etc, I’m generally pretty engrossed as is. Idle hands, and such.

Along with all this other healthy living noise, I’ve been doing a decent job at the QUALITY of what I’m putting in my mouth, if not the quantity. I have been reliably eating about 1900-2000 calories per day average, which I know at my current level of activity is just about maintenance level if not mayyyybe a little under. So, I’m not losing weight and that’s okay, because I’m not currently doing the things to lose weight. I’m a little grumpy about that, but at least it makes sense. Between a new lifting program and trying to eat the good food and not be a jerk and have vodka for dinner every few days, I’ll give myself some grace to allow myself to eat enough not to feel (too) hungry as long as it’s good quality food, for the most part.

I have been tracking and quantifying all my food, so that’s a huge step in the right direction. Next week, I’m bringing out some of the big guns – food that is lower in calorie but should be just as filling. I’m going to try to stay away from overloading on full fat cheese and high calorie sauces/dressings, and really stress less sweet fruits like berries and plums that are higher in fiber but not as many calories. Still the same method of tracking calories and/or diet quality, I’m just trying to play the game a little better. At some points in my life, at this level of activity, 1200-1500 was a normal day – not that I want to go that low, but 1600-1800 should not be THIS HARD.

Tacos often save my life for meals these days. Whole grain (corn tortilla). Lean protein (organic beef). Dairy (light organic sour cream and cheese). Veggies? Well, I get lots of veggies elsewhere. 🙂

Speaking of hard… I’ve really got a block about this learning to do video thing. I have no problems with pictures (I mean, obviously). I actually have gotten comfortable with the live streaming thing – both on a professional capacity and now at home streaming driving games (most Saturdays at 6pm – come watch us drive badly for a few hours). Making what I’m considering “video content” (at my desk, about a topic, with some picture references) is a little harder. My husband was terribly kind to set it up for me, and then I realized how GROSS that view of the office is (the background is a bunch of papers and mess and the closet door) and now I’m self conscious about that. Since that’s what I have to work with, I’m going to have to figure it out.

Then, of course, there’s all this crap. For the moment, I’m mostly going to leave it alone or I’m going to have to go back on that drinking thing… y’know… My baby steps are going to be:

I took the first step and applied for a brand ambassadorship for a small company I like and respect. My goal is to keep an eye out for other ones that come up that I’m interested in (though I missed the window for a lot of them by waiting until after the first of the year).

I plan to be more interactive on social media. I think I’ve finally gotten over feeling like an internet weirdo about commenting on people’s instagrams and twitters and stuff. It feels like this is what blogs used to be, and the best way for me to feel like part of a group instead of an outsider looking in is to be a participant and just clicking <3 does not count.

I think I feel so awkward about asking for help because I haven’t paid it forward enough yet. So, I’m going to look for opportunities to offer help where and when I can. I may not have copious free time, but I’m happy to offer advice on shit I know about – being a productive and efficient human (even if I don’t always follow through I know HOW), advice on the video game industry, advice on training or healthy diets and at least casual advice on helpful things to do to make that thing stop hurting or feeling weak or being a beta reader for a book or whatever. I’m going to look for opportunities to help and mentor and maybe I’ll be more comfortable asking for it myself.

Whew, ok, getting heavy again. Reading these non-fiction books is making me think too much. At least the one I’m reading right now (Run Fast, Run Forever) is just kind of making me nod along going “yep, I’ve followed this training plan before, I know I like it…”.

The one day where we were not either freezing or raining we went and played bikes in the woods. And it was glorious!

It’s not been all business time. I’ve played a lot of games. Video games, table top games, some board games, and we even went bowling with some friends. I had one of my best scores in a while, something like 145 (and of course, I forgot to get photographic evidence). We saw Brian Posehn on Friday (with tickets practically right on the stage, it was awesome). We had lunch and game with the family on Saturday. We saw Black Panther on Sunday and it was really powerful. I’m so close to actually breaking out my canvases and paints and my beads. We played mountain bikes last weekend on a day that was actually not cold or rainy. I have spent a few rainy mornings in bed reading, and sometimes it’s even fluffy sci-fi fiction! There is downtime being had, folks.

It feels like winter is starting to come to an end, even if technically we have another month, and even if the weather surprises us like crap days with rain and 30 degrees. I’m really looking forward to Spring – in that I’ll be training (aka, get to play outside in the pretty weather) but not training TOO much (aka, get to play outside in the pretty weather occasionally doing things that don’t include watts/pace suggestions). First, though, I need to sort out two things – my spring training plan and my spring race schedule. Then the season can ACTUALLY change.

What are you most looking forward to about Spring?

I don’t know and I don’t care.

By Quix

On February 20, 2018

In Uncategorized

Let me tell you a story about a little history repeating itself.

I don’t really have any related pictures, so here’s a selfie of me as a unicorn.

I have been stuck in a specific game for two years now, and I’m kind of embarrassed to admit why. *I* made a mistake by trying to play the game what I thought would be the most efficient way and not paying attention to what I *should* do. After a while, I found myself in an area where I was outmatched and outclassed. Advice told me that I needed to go back and level up by playing some optional content in the game.

I got mad at that suggestion. “If it’s optional, why do I *have* to do it to not get beaten down?” I whined. “This is totally ‘fifteen pieces of flair‘ bullshit.” For two years, I complained instead of taking action and doing the thing they suggested. “The game shouldn’t let me progress like that,” I said. “I’m stuck and overwhelmed at the prospect of going further and I don’t’ know what to do.”

This year, I made it a goal to get through the whole game because I realized I was being an idiot. It sounds like a silly and empty resolution, but it’s actually teaching me a few life lessons that are not so trivial.

First of all, unblocking myself on a task (because, while we try to hide it well, games are a series of tasks) I’ve been putting off for two years is ROUGH. After a while, you turn a blind eye to it, whatever it is that you want to do but keep putting off, and you get comfortable with it not being done. There have been years where rooms of my house didn’t even exist to me because I wasn’t ready to deal with them. I’ve also gotten comfortable with a lot of things that I shouldn’t over the years – being overweight, not being a capable runner, being prone to injury because I let pre-hab slip, letting myself and my education stagnate, not jumping on opportunities… I could continue to sit here and air my sins, but you get the drift. I’ve passed by making progress and pursuing dreams because it “sounds hard”.

Here’s something hard – running a fucking marathon after a full workday swimming and biking. Probably harder – spending months training to do this, logging a ridiculous amount of time in the pool, on the bike, and on the roads. Getting to the point where a 20 mile run long day actually felt like a break because it only took three and three quarter hours instead of the entire day to complete. Hard is finding that last gear half a mile from the finish line and riding the line of maximum effort staving off the dry heaves and the urge to collapse. Hard is turning away from beer and bbq for one more lap after riding for more than five hours, even if it means nothing to anyone but you.

Level of Ironman difficulty – less than asking someone for help, apparently…

This is the stuff that looks nice and heroic on the Instagrams.

What sounds stupid, but was harder? Starting my book. Sitting at my desk writing words. Like I’m doing right now. Like I do all the time. Just in a different format about different things with different stakes on the result in my brain. That’s right, the idea of swimming, biking, and running 140.6 miles sounds wayyyy less intimidating to me than writing a lot of words and asking someone to deem it worthy of publishing and promoting and then asking people to pay monies for it. In fact, this, a million, trillion times over. The idea of doing TEN Ironman races is less scary than that.

What I’m coming to terms with this year is that I do an EXCELLENT job of hiding fear and insecurity and sheer terror from myself with a “fuck it” attitude. “I don’t know what to do” is my way of dismissing something that I’m intimidated by from the realm of possibility because no one has approached me and handed me the knowledge or solution on a silver platter. Entitled, who me? *sarcasm*

Did I know how to train for and complete and Ironman five years ago? Did I know much about fitness or nutrition ten years ago? Did I know how to run a successful online game fifteen years ago? Did I know psychology twenty years ago? The answer is NO, but I do now. “I don’t know what to do” is a stupid excuse in and of itself. What I really mean is one of two things:

I’m lazy. This is the valid excuse. I’m totally alright with being unwilling to dedicate the time and effort to making something a priority, as long as I’m honest about what it means to me and/or how I can get around without that in my life. I don’t know how to install a kitchen counter top, and that’s fine, because I paid someone to do it. I don’t know how to write code but right now my job nor my hobbies depend on this knowledge. And that’s fine. We all can’t be superstars at everything. I am not superwoman.

Most of my house projects fall into this category (I’m not scared of organizing the pantry I just haven’t prioritized it), but when the day came where my kitchen was set to be demolished, I realized I was actually scared. Honestly, I was so happy to see my empty kitchen that first evening because I knew from there, there was no going back and I had no choice but to see this through. That leads me to the second meaning…

I’m terrified. This is what I need to cut out. This is where I’m lying to myself and convincing myself that I don’t give a flying fig about something, when I actually do. I’m not willing to sit down to the table and face the fact that I’m going to do something challenging, I might fail, and that yes, that actually matters. If you look at my race reports, the bad ones have a different tone in the last few years. Early to mid-2010s, if I had a bad race, I might find myself sobbing in the shower after a little too much champagne or at least really bummed about it. Then, the breakthrough races happened where I’d be walking on air for a week.

Lately, all the highs and lows are gone. I had a disastrous 3M – which was supposed to be an A race – and I was over it by the time we walked out of the beer tent. I had a pretty great Kerrville Sprint last year and I was more excited about the camping trip than the race at the time. I did a freaking Ironman and I was over it pretty quickly, I didn’t see the big deal (though, as the months have passed, the BIG DEAL has come into focus). While you can chalk this up to being more seasoned, older, wiser… I’m not sure I’m ok with this prosac-like response to my life.

It’s ok to feel both comedy and tragedy.

I should be upset if my race falls apart. I should be elated if I accomplish a goal I’ve trained for. I’m totally allowed to be scared of doing something new. I should have butterflies when I toe the line of a race or take the first step towards learning or doing a new thing. I need to be HONEST with myself, and I’m allowed to feel the feelings. I actually NEED to feel the feelings to be the human I want to be. I like the idea of “feeling the fear and doing it anyway”. But, I have to FEEL it and know that I’m SCARED (because I can conquer that), not just convince myself that I don’t care enough.

Speaking of mildly scary things, the kitchen turned out amazing, which will help bolster my confidence in taking on something else similar in the future. However, just like the Ironman, it took months of effort to get it done and my ~~body~~ house is STILL not 100% completely back to normal (soon). I have a healthy respect for the effort, though I know it’s in my capability. I just need to be properly prepared mentally for the process if I were to take it on again.

And, coming full circle, back to the game I want to finish, I think in this instance it was really more of the former (my own entitlement and laziness), but surely there were elements of the latter. What if the game was too hard and I’d fail? I tend to quit games that I lose at initially. Somewhere along the line in my life, getting smacked down does not inspire me to get back up again. It makes me take my ball and go home. That’s fine when it consists of pixels on a screen, but when it creeps into other areas like sports and other goals, I don’t like it. And since we are what we repeatedly do, it’s not good practice.

My eyes are opening to the fact that I’ve lived in this bubble for quite a while, where rejection and failure live outside. I live a fairly comfortable life where people are generally nice to me and I do just fine performing the daily tasks of being a moderately successful productive human. Unless I seek it out, I don’t really need to face the scary stuff. I could probably live the rest of my life here and no one would think less of me, except me.

This really hit me when I arrived at the six hour race. There was no ambiguity here. I was highly outclassed, and that’s not being dismissive of my capability in sports, it’s the honest truth. I was the little leaguer showing up to a varsity game. My BEST case scenario (minus a competitor’s mechanical or injury, which no one with any sense of dignity or karma wishes on anyone) was finishing last having ridden what I’m capable of even when I’m trained (which I was not). It was really weird to face being the worst at something, at best, and potentially completely failing at it because of my lack of preparation.

What a weird feeling… lining up to be the worst at something for six hours…

Processing my failure ahead of time really kind of helped me go into it with a different attitude. “I don’t know how to not lose this race but I’m going to do my best anyway.” This has helped me realize that I need to own my shit this year. I don’t know how to do a lot of things that I really want to do and I’m not going to let that be the sole reason I don’t do them.

It is OK for me to write a book that no one wants to publish. There will be other books (I have at least three more swimming around in my head).
It is OK for me to race my fucking guts out for a podium and come in fourth or tenth or last. There will always be other races.
It is OK for me to start a business or offer a product that totally flops. Most entrepreneurs don’t hit it big on the first, second, or sometimes even twentieth idea. If it’s something I want, I’ll keep trying.
It is OK for me to reach out to someone for mentorship who either rejects or ignores me.
It is NOT OK for me to lie to myself about the importance of these things to me. They are important. It is OK to be disappointed, even temporarily crushed, about them going poorly. It’s called being a human, not a robot.

The mentor thing is the weirdest and seems like the easiest to conquer but if I could skip this step and never ask for help from anyone ever, I would HAPPILY do that. Forever and ever amen. But, that’s not how the world works. When the shoe is on the other foot – I don’t mind answering questions or helping people with things I’m good at doing. I actually love when I get those opportunities, it’s a lot of fun, but I always HATE ASKING FOR HELP myself. Because it makes me feel weak and annoying. Which is dumb. It’s scary to be vulnerable, but I’m learning it’s necessary to grow.

Going forward, my goal is to be honest with myself, and when I find something that’s keeping me from a goal, don’t let “I don’t know” or “I don’t care” be an excuse if it’s something that matters to me. I need to figure out what the road block is, and either work through it or be honest with myself that the price is too high at the moment. It’s not that I don’t know or don’t care. It’s that I’m overwhelmed and intimidated and I know how to fix that if my brain lets me process what I’m actually feeling.

Oh, and the game I’m playing? I’m over halfway through and I’ve found that it’s a HECK OF A LOT OF FUN. I’m finding myself playing it a lot and definitely not just because I’m forcing myself to achieve a goal. I feel stupid for spending the last two years stuck, but apparently, things happen when they happen for a reason.

Earning the right to run

By Quix

On February 13, 2018

In Uncategorized

Back in the day when I started this whole “trying to not be such a fatass” thing in 2007, I had no intentions of ever running unless chased.

I also didn’t know what a deadlift was, so there’s that...

The elliptical or the Dance Dance Revolution game pad were more my style, as was the weight room. You see, at 200-something lbs, running doesn’t even seem possible. However, more low impact cardio (or cardio that at least DISTRACTED from the impact like playing a game) wasn’t terrible. However, even at my highest weight, I could still enjoy and make progress at lifting heavy things.

I started my fitness program with 20 mins of cardio three times a week, and did strength exercises or lifted weights almost as much at 15 minutes at the same frequency. From there, as I found I enjoyed it (and as the holiday season approached and I decided I wanted to keep losing weight instead of gaining it), I increased the amount of time little by little. For the first two years or so of this whole shebang, I was working out up to about five hours a week and two of those were lifting.

Oddly enough, I had very little complaints in terms of injury. I was running miles and 5ks faster than I do now on approximately 2 hours per week of actual RUNNING. I was also able to maintain a weight that is about 25-30 lbs lighter than I am now.

Once I started training for half marathons, I didn’t have the 2 hours a week to lift, so I cut it down to just a little maintenance lifting and then when I found triathlons, forget it. Three sports to train meant something had to give. Besides some targeted, focused periods where I lifted heavy throughout the last seven years, I tended to shy away from it. I would either do bodyweight stuff, or just slack on it entirely. Don’t get me wrong, mat exercises are both worthy and important, but the best way to build muscle and get strong and stable? Lift heavy things.

Step one, pick up heavy thing, step two, put it down, step three, don’t collapse on the way to the car.

Once I get into a routine of doing it, it’s great. I actually look forward to the gym. It’s one exercise where my performance doesn’t suffer doing it in the morning vs when I’m actually awake. The shock of different things feeling sore fades after a few weeks and you just feel… good.

But, those 2-3 weeks of prelude to that, feeling like a baby deer with noodle arms? Those are hard. I’m actually doing much better initially this time because I have spent the last two months doing bodyweight work (foundations). Funny how doing something the right way makes it easier. The next few weeks are actually remembering how to swing a kettle bell around in three sets of eight reps and where they keep the little weight lock things so the plates don’t fall off while I bench press (hypertrophy). So far, it’s going well, and I’m kind of looking forward to when the weights get to three digits in some lifts and the reps are more like 3 because that’s all you can handle.

I read somewhere a long time ago that you had to earn your right to run with proper strengthening of your muscles FIRST. I inadvertently did that in 2007 and 2008. The problem is you have to re-earn it over and over and over, not just once. I’m now complaining on and off about a wonky shoulder and knee and ankle and heel and every race for the last year, if not longer, has had a caveat of “I did well considering my body wasn’t 100% at the starting line”. Guess how long I’ve been out of the gym – that period of time plus about six months.

It’s time to re-earn my right to run.

I’m not doing anything revolutionary. Three times a week, with at least a day in between, I’m heading to the gym to do all the things that make me harder, better, faster, stronger. Squats. Kettlebells. Bench presses. Deadlifts. Core exercises that make me play the “cramps or just sore abs” game.

Hopefully these days will come back soon… sans the wonky heel.

I haven’t set food on a road, track, or treadmill since over two weeks ago, and my heel is still giving me shit off and on. I’m super sick of being broken and limping along and doing alright considering at races. I’m looking to this next 6-8 weeks to fix me. It has before. I hope it will again. I’d give anything to show up to a start line completely healthy, without any caveats.

These three hours a week are the most important things on my schedule. I’ve also got 30-60 mins of cardio three times a week, but to be honest? If something had to fall off, it would be this. If the air stopped being both stupid cold and trying to kill me with allergies, I could knock this out with my normal walking I do on a weekly basis if I wanted to count that. I don’t, because I’d like to not die when I start triathlon training again, but I could by the letter of the program.

It’s a weird adjustment to be paring down so low on cardio (and calling it cardio, not training, it feels so un-triathlete of me), but it’s refreshing to shake things up. I know the endurance comes back quickly, and I’m not training for anything long for quite a while. Hopefully, I can take the next two months and earn my right to run, and run fast.

January wrap up, February goals

By Quix

On February 1, 2018

In Uncategorized

January is my least favorite month. And now it’s over! Woohoo!

Both nacho cat and I are thrilled about this.

I spent some time thinking about it and while the cold kind of sucks, and it’s depressing that it’s dark all the time AND there’s no Christmas light to brighten it up, the real bummer is the allergies. January is a month where you just have to stay inside a lot and that’s kind of against my nature.

However, there are opportunities that come with the cold and the dark and the inside that I don’t get to capitalize on all year. Let’s call them the silver lining, because they’re still under the rain clouds, but if nothing else, January and February feel unique. And that’s something.

I went a little gung ho with goals last month, even trying to moderate, and I definitely realized the need to back the eff up on some of them. I definitely underestimated how crispy I was from the last two months of remodel and all the other DOING THINGS last year. January was a bit of a forced reset in some aspects, and some nonsense wrapped up and it actually felt pretty good.

Sporty Stuff:

These feet are moving faster than they have in quite a while. Thank you speedwork.

I’ve covered this a lot.

I had a very short but fairly successful cycle training for 3M, breaking through some barriers.

Then, I had a really rough day where blisters, nagging injuries, and my digestive system decided to undermine my chance at a PR at 3M.

The next week, I had a pretty solid day at the Indoor Tri.

This weekend I will ride my bike much longer than I am trained for and call it the end of this weird little winter mini-season and start the process towards being a well-built sprint triathlete.

I’ve detailed my frustrations in previous posts, so let me focus on my wins:

I think I’ve figured out what my left knee/heel/ankle issue is (mildly collapsing arches) and the solution is pretty easy and apparent – my insoles. I’ve worn them to walk around in since I got them and they’ve been comfortable and I’ve felt way better.
I have found some momentum (not perfection, but getting there) in proper planning and sticking to it. If I make sane, and specific plans, I tend to follow them. I may have to accept that giving myself a bunch of slack right now is asking for me to hang myself (not literally).
While I haven’t been perfect, I have re-established some good habits with stretching (and shoulder rehab – whatever is crunchy in there is getting better). I think spending the 5-10 minutes doing something good for myself almost every day is worth it.
I’ve made it to this point, even with some hiccups along the way, extremely excited to start building for 2018 spring and fall seasons!

This month is all about going back to foundations. I have a few goals:

3x week heavy strength training for the next 4-6 weeks. This is priority number one. I’m going to pump (clap) ME up.
3x week 30-60 mins cardio. While I’m going to play the intensity a little by ear depending on how the lifting is going, I want to continue to keep a little speedwork in my life and not lose the gains I’ve made with remembering how to push myself on the run.
Continue to stretch and roll and boots and shoulder rehab on the daily. Get used to my insoles on shorter runs.
Make a structured training plan through the end of September (Cozumel 70.3). Try to narrow down what races I actually want to do (I could race every weekend from now until then if I wanted…) and plan exactly when I’ll take a small break in the middle.

Nutrition:

The only possible thing you can eat on a day that your car pees and freezes is pho. Them’s the rules.

It’s been a month of baby steps.

I tracked my food for about 18 days and fell off the wagon near 3M and haven’t yet started again. I can put up some excuses but I just didn’t do it and I’ll own it. Without even finishing tracking this month and without analyzing what I did track, I know I ate probably a little too much for my activity level and also ate stuff that was lower quality than I should. But, the holiday leftover treats are finally making its way out of our fridge and pantry and I’m not replacing them.

I made some steps to track my alcohol intake, but like a dummy, I forgot to get my own bottle of vodka and because I shared it, I have no idea when I ran out of what I intended, but I’m pretty sure I went over. However, the win here is that we’re back to our normal FREQUENCY of enjoying a cocktail (1-2 times a week max) and it’s starting to feel normal again instead of a drag.

February is about quantification. I’m not going to make a bunch of crazy rules that nitpick specific things like I can only have whiskey between 7-9pm on a Wednesday or I can only have a splurge meal on Saturday afternoons or whatever. I know how this works and I know how to succeed, it’s just, like, DOING it, and being consistent.

Track all my food starting Feb 5th. Aim for roughly 1600-1800 calories per day (yes even on weekends).
Analyze diet quality once a week. Keep the average over 20.

This should simultaneously work to control my portions, limit alcohol, sweets, and refined grains, while pushing good quality food.

Life and Stuff:

Random days off because your city is frozen (and has no infrastructure to fix it) make for some awesome relaxing productive happy fun times.

Here’s a funny thing – when you’re not knee deep in a giant project, training is steady but pretty light, and you’re in town the whole month… you can accomplish a lot without feeling overwhelmed! Here are things that I did:

I finished one chapter of my book. Chapter 7, if you will. I’m not 100% happy with it and I know it needs a lot of revision but it was one of the toughest yet to muscle through and I did it and I’ll fix it when I do my second pass.

Christmas stuff is put away. Sadface. At least I have my disco kitchen to make me happy year round.

The garage is half done. It was either spend the time shoving shit in random places so we could get the second car back in or actually take time to organize and clean some things out and do it right the first time. So we’re doing the latter, and we’ll finish the job next weekend.

I think I did a decent job at relaxing this month and spending some actual downtime slacking. It’s much easier when it’s cold outside and/or the air is trying to kill you to not want to adventure and DO ALL THE THINGS. Like I said, this season is a great opportunity to hide inside and not feel bad that I’m missing all the beautiful weather. Feeling a constant itch in my eyes and tension in my sinuses does not nice weather make, no matter if it’s actually in the 60s or 70s outside. 😛

I have really really really gotten into a few games again and it feels nice (and actually quite peaceful) to spend some time actually playing video games. I mean, it is my livelihood… Hopefully my left leg continues on it’s healing path and I can feasibly play some Dance Dance Revolution soon for recreation!

There’s some sort of mental block I’m having with movies. I did two of them and felt ridiculous. I think I may want to do LESS of them, but maybe get myself set up with the webcam in front of my computer and actually plan out what I’m going to say and talk about something useful.

I made a necklace and two pairs of earrings! I had brief thoughts of setting up an Etsy store to sell the earrings (the necklaces are a labor of love and too much work to be cost effective to sell). I still might, because the idea of selling a handful of them and paying for all the money I’ve sank into the hobby for ten years is intriguing, but the last thing I want to do right now is to make something I’m having fun with into an obligation. I think once I teach myself a little more about marketing, it might be a nice, low risk thing to practice selling.

I read Millionaire Fastlane as one of my non-fiction books this month. The guy is a little rough around the edges, but a lot of the things in his book resonated with me. He addressed some things that have felt icky or squishy or weird to me about starting a business and I feel like I have just a little more focus on at least what I need to learn. I definitely have more to say on this later, but I’m really happy I picked this one to read.

I also read a very badly written book geared toward newbie triathlon (badly written both in style/editing and also some of the advice was totally bunk) that I won’t bother mentioning much about. However, it made me realize that really and truly any Joe Schmo can write and publish a book. It IS possible for me. And I guarantee mine will be better (I think it probably is already more coherent already as a first unfinished draft), so it won’t be the absolute worst book in the world!

What’s on tap for February?

Finish picking up and organizing the garage so it’s back to normal with two cars in it and everything stored away properly.
Organize the pantry. We didn’t do this over Christmas break like normal and it’s definitely in need of about 1-2 hours of love.
One more chapter in my book. While this schedule means I won’t have it done by my birthday, I don’t want to force it to the point of burnout to make some arbitrary deadline. If I’m so inspired, I’ll write more. Three more to go!
Read a business book and read a sporty non-fiction book.
Make one 3-5 minute one-take live video about… something. Let’s start small here.
Remember to do fun things that aren’t just dorking on social media like playing games, making jewelry, maybe break the paints out and get some canvases.
On a day in which the air is not trying to kill me an it’s nice outside, go for a cruiser bike adventure day.

I’m looking forward to February. From this side of it, it looks calm. Peaceful. Like a chance to recharge my batteries and reset to kick ass through the rest of the year. That seems like a breath of fresh air, even if the pollen in said air is trying to kill me…

Lifetime Indoor Tri

By Quix

On January 30, 2018

In Uncategorized

Sunday, I found myself up at 3:30am.

While the reason for the ridiculous time was actually allergies, it wasn’t too far off from my 5am alarm for the Lifetime Indoor Tri. While it was fairly inconvenient timing – I really should have spent the weekend logging more saddle time and also getting prepped for camping next weekend – I love this stupid little race and I couldn’t say no when Zliten gave me the puppy dog eyes to sign up.

Funny thing – on the way into work Monday, he was like, “wow, I didn’t realize how much this would disrupt our week”, and then, thankfully, “I see what you were saying…” because, yeah, I did complain about it. However, even given the alternative, I’m still glad I did it. It’s a great opportunity to start chipping away at the bottom of the well of the pain cave to make it deeper for the races that actually matter later in the year.

I did more of the things right than I did last week. I ate a full sunbutter and honey sandwich, I had a few caffeinated beans and my earl grey tea (hot). I also woke up in enough time (barely) to use the restroom enough so my stomach was clear before the race (grumble grumble maybe I do need to set my alarm earlier grumble grumble). I went into the race feeling probably just the right amount of pressure – I wanted to do well and I knew I had a chance to podium, but it wasn’t like… the most important thing in the world.

Swim:

I slipped into the water and found a song that didn’t suck on my swimp3 player and was actually longer than the 10 minutes I was going to swim, and the countdown started… 3, 2, 1, and I pushed off the wall.

I am a steady pace swimmer, I’m not one to sprint out of the gate, and I saw my husband, who was sharing a lane with me, pull ahead. I knew we had different swim styles, and the last thing I wanted to do was race him head to head getting in each other’s way, so I actually dropped back a little and drafted off him for the first half. He started to slow, so I passed him and offered up my feet to draft on – I think he hung on for a while but by the end I was approximately half a lap ahead of him (though since he made it halfway we both got credit for our 19 lengths).

19 lengths (475m) in 10 mins (5/17 open women)

Exactly the same as last year. Considering how different this pace is from my normal swim at Pure’s pool (which is admittedly a little short), I think their pool is a little bit longer than 25m. Though, I’ll never know. Last year I was definitely in better swim shape at this point, so I will take it. Could I have pushed harder and maybe eeked out another half or full lap? Probably, but I always see my swim as my warmup, and honestly, anything I gain by pushing really really hard and redlining on this leg generally counts against either my transition or bike. So, I don’t.

That’s not to say that I don’t plan to work on my swim, or work on efforts in practice that would be considered finding my edge… but that’s not where I need to be in racing. In non-drafting triathlon, there’s not a huge advantage to coming out of the water in the first pack so I’ll continue to swim uncomfortably comfortable and save the puke-worthy efforts for later in the race.

Bike:

Having 10 minutes to transition always seems like such a luxury until you actually have to manage it. I finished at the far end of the pool so making my way back took probably a minute. Then, I put on my bibs and jersey and grabbed a bag I had put together with all the rest of the crap I needed (good job, past me, that was helpful), and got to the cycle studio quickly. However, I didn’t do a great job at making sure it was all packed efficiently (bad job, past me) and after fumbling with my stuff I was on the bike and pedaling just in time.

This level of effort always surprises me this early in the year. I’ve not prepared specifically for a sustained 30 minutes of pain – I’ve been either riding easy to recover during half marathon training or doing shorter (1-4 minute) intervals. I had a number I wanted to see (170-180 watts), though I had a coin flip in my head whether that was the right one, and I knew the effort would sort itself out eventually. Watts don’t lie when pitted against level of effort.

Ten minutes in, I wanted the watts to lie to me a little. I was holding in the low 160s, which was not *terrible* considering I don’t those bike’s sensors calibrations from a hole in the ground, and the effort felt like “kill me noawwww” but not “I’m dead”. I did take 15-20 seconds every few minutes near the end to get out of the saddle and jog, dropping my watts a little, but I had to do something to break up the seemingly never ending UNCOMFORT.

Just like tempo runs, FTP testing/long intervals are my least favorite bikes. Which means I need to do more of them. The best way for me to force myself to do more of them is to go to cycle class and schedule them in the program and also maybe do some TT bike racing if I can find such a thing that fits in with the sprint-triathalon-a-palooza I plan to do this spring.

10.1 miles in 30 minutes (20.2 mph) (3/17 open women)

Considering that I was all bike all the time at this point last year, and in the last few months my cycling has been sporadic and highly recreational, I’ll take the .2 mph in reduction from last year. Things are looking good for when I actually start digging into getting fit for a short and painful sprint triathlon bike split this spring.

Here’s the painful part, I crunched the numbers and if I would have pushed harder (10.4 like I did last year), I would have ended up 3rd overall. It’s a great confirmation that it’s. all. about. the. bike.

Run:

Again, five minutes to walk next door and find a treadmill sounds luxurious, but I decided to change out of my jersey (on the gym floor, I am the opposite of modest) and futz with my shoes a bit and music and then OMG all of a sudden it was 3, 2, 1… GO!

I was super excited to crush this 20 minute run because I had been training for this – all the intervals I’ve run in the last six weeks may not have necessarily paid off for the half marathon, but surely it would help me here, right? I had wide eyed dreams of holding some 8 minute mile pace because I actually have some experience at that this year.

However, I forgot about the whole “off the really hard bike” part of triathlon. It’s been a while. My goal was to start with low-9 minute miles and see how quickly I could get into the 8s. My legs had other plans and felt incredibly noodle-y off the bike and that was a hard NO out of the gate.

Luckily, 10 minutes/mile felt fairly relaxed, so I got my bearings there and quickly found the oomph to press the UP button on the treadmill speed a few times until it felt ROUGH around 6.3. I stuck with it. My heart rate wasn’t pegged yet (it was high 160s, low 170s, I know I have a little more before I hit my ceiling), but my legs just felt like lead and it was taking all my concentration to keep them turning over fast enough to stay on the treadmill.

I spent more time than I wanted to in those mid-9 minute miles because I barely felt like I was hanging on, but then I found something else with about 5 minutes to go and picked up the pace. I finished strong and improved on last year.

2.13 miles in 20 minutes (9:20/mile) (7/17 open women)

While this is confirmation that my run still needs work and is still my lowest ranking in the disciplines, it’s getting better.

I’m really happy with my speedwork allowing me to dig deep and not surrender here. A scant .05 more in 20 minutes seems like an incremental gain, but I will take it. I think what I’m more proud of is the process. I felt the uncomfortable part of the run where I wasn’t sure I could hang on AND I DID.

I need to do that and feel that feeling a million more times over the course of this year and realize that I’ve got more in there than I realize, I just have to get messy and tap into the uncomfortable place, and frankly, blow the hell up a few times to find the line. Not quit because my brain says it’s hard. Not quit because a stupid injury is nagging at me (though obvs. I need to take care of these things). No, I need to find the point of being crumpled up on the side of the road dry heaving and barely able to stand. Only then can I *really* know where the line is. For the last few years I’ve been working on finding the endurance line which is actually really effing far given a reasonable pace and proper training. Now I’ve got the need for speed.

2018 is going to be the year of HANGING THE F%#K ON. I’ve been whining about my speed for years, but I haven’t been willing to do anything about it. Why? Because that work isn’t sexy and it’s really brutal. It’s thrilling to go through the process of doing your first Ironman. Century bike rides! Twenty mile runs! You look accomplished as f#&k on the instagrams.

The kind of work I’ll be doing this year will look totally weak in comparison. Taking 20 seconds of a 5k PR, hell, finding my 5k PR again from many years ago, these things don’t smack of the heroic. But, they are the horses that I’m choosing to chase down this year in the pursuit of race podiums. The end result is sexy. But the work to get there totally isn’t. Gotta keep my eyes on the prize though!

Overall – I ended up 6/17 in the open women’s division. If I was 2 years older, I would have ended up 3rd in masters and if I would have pushed harder on the bike…. yeah. A little disappointed at the result but not at the process so I’ll move on and take it as fuel for the fire to train harder for the races that really matter in the spring.

Next up in the crazy winter race-a-palooza, the ill-advised six hour bike race. I can’t lie, I would love to see a podium here (but certainly don’t expect it) and depending on who and what (aka – my brain and legs) shows up, could either be a hilarious notion or a distinct possibility.

Adjusted Reality

“Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.” – Mark Twain

Tag: triathlon Page 12 of 37

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