Adjusted Reality

So the weight verdict?  159.2.  Yeah.  So not cool at all.  I am back to tracking my calories in and out as such and weighing daily until I reach under 155.  I haven’t decided how many days I’m going to make myself weigh under 155 before I go back to normal life, but at least a few.  Honestly, I feel like my calorie allotments are WAY too high but I know the math makes sense for the training I’m doing.  Which is why I stopped tracking in the first place – 2000 calories feels like a fail/splurge but damned if my body doesn’t need it days I’m running hard.  I actually underate yesterday @ 1800 calories since it was a running day.

So we shall see.  I’ll report in soon and let you all know how my little experiment is going.  However, it’s almost hump day, so I think it’s time for a little fluff up in here, yeah?

And by fluff, I’m talking about fashion.  First, a PSA and a plea to everyone out there who has lost some weight or doesn’t have anything that fits them properly: GO SHOPPING.  This weekend.  Or right now.  There is nothing that makes you feel more fabulous than a few properly fitting outfits.  Get thee to a thrift store.  Over the last 3 years, I’ve had to pretty much get a whole new wardrobe each season, and I was able to do so for about 100 bucks by hitting up Savers, which gives you 20% off your purchase if you bring a donation.  Thrift store clothes on a discount.  This makes me a happy girl.

If that’s still out of your price range, at least pick up a few pairs of jeans that are the proper size and fit, a few shirts that make you feel fabulous, and a dress/skirt/dress outfit that befits a night out on the town.  If you have a dress code at work (I’m lucky as our only rule is really show up with your naughty bits covered), pick up a few work-appropriate outfits as well.  If you’re sad that no one has noticed your progress thus far, it’s probably because you’re wearing clothes that make you look bigger… they will after this!

So, you have no idea WHAT to purchase?  Well, let me help you with my opinions.  I may be getting old, but there is a lot of CRAP out there fashion-wise lately.  Here is my completely judgmental, skewed, and biased view of some of the things we call fashion today.

Things I LOVE:

1.  The sweater/knee skirt/tights/boots look.

This is seriously one of my favorite new fashions in a while.  I’ve seen it on curvy girls, skinny girls, topheavy girls, bottom heavy girls, and it just looks fantastic.  Polished, sophisticated, put together, but also fun and spunky.  Which leads to the next…

2.  Colored tights/patterned tights

Seriously so much fun.  I haven’t gotten into this as much as I’d like to as I have lots of patterned skirts and not that many plain (minus two minis that are not really office appropriate), and just don’t quite have the hang of pattern mixing.  But I have a great pair of zebra stripey ones that go well with my black dress(es) and the green and white stripey ones were fun for x-mas.  I have argyle ones and silver sparklies too but I haven’t worn them in a while.  DO WANT a nice pair of red, blue, and brown to go with my nude and black ones – but haven’t obtained yet.

Things I am learning to like:

1.  Skinny jeans (mostly as a vehicle for boots/heels)

Now, for the longest time I poo poo’d these, saying I wore them once, and I won’t wear them again and bought the biggest bellbottoms I could.  However, I’ve come to terms that treated properly, skinny jeans can be HAWT.  Like throw a pair of boots on top.  I tried to do this with a pair of my almost not-boot cut jeans and it didn’t work.  I need the real deal.  I’m thinking they could totally be amazing with heels too (which I have and don’t wear because I don’t have any pants that don’t eat them).  So, I ask the ladies out there – have you tried on these?  Did I just have x-mas bloat or do they run about 2 sizes smaller than normal jeans?

2.  Long sweaters:

Now, I also knocked these for the longest time, and then Zliten actually picked one up for me when he was out shopping.  I love it.  Somehow, it fits perfectly (which is a miracle) and is great for those days where I want something just super comfy and would rather be at home in my blanket, but don’t want to look like a complete ragamuffin in a sweatshirt.  It actually looks fairly cute and put together with a pair of not-super-wide leg jeans, boots, and a patterned scarf and you can almost pretend you’re in PJs!

Things I still hate:

1.  Non-maternity pregnant lady shirts

You would think that this might hide a little extra belly, right?  In most cases, OH SO WRONG.  The ONLY time I ever see these actually look good one people are fairly skinny gals with a little pooch.  If you have big shoulders and/or boobs, this will just make you look bigger.  If you have more than a little belly, this will NOT hide it.  If you are toned in the middle then HOLY GOD WHY ARE YOU WEARING A PSEUDO MATERNITY SHIRT? *deepbreath*

2.  Super long shirts

This is pretty much a dress I wore dancing in 1997 – oh, you mean it’s a shirt?  But it pretty much covers my ass!  I don’t know what is up with the whole shirt dress thing but I hate it.  Me = short torso.  Any shirts that go much beyond my hip bones look horrible with jeans.  I mean perhaps it’s because I’m not wearing super low rise jeans (see below), but I much prefer the actual dress-over-jeans look (and I’m not a fan, honestly) than fake-dress-over-jeans.   Maaaaaybe this is that one exception where leggings might work, but still, again, not a fan.

I think this may be my worst fashion pet peeve.  I can’t order t-shirts online because you never know how long they are going to be. and I can rarely find flattering ones even in stores (thank you, thrift stores….).

3.  Shirts that poof out on your stomach and then get tight on your hips:

I’ve been caught by these before.  This one isn’t particularly cute, but I’ve tried on some that are.  I like the gypsy sleeves and the hippie dippie look, and from the front it’s cute, right?  Well turn sideways and even if you don’t have a pooch, this shirt gives it to you.  And really, in what world is shirt-stretched-over-jeans-tightly cute and flattering for anyone?

4.  Super low rise jeans

Again, these look great on really skinny chicks with no belly fat.  On the rest of us NOT prominently displaying our hipbones, that natural little bit of bump below our belly button gets squished in the middle and looks ackward.  And honestly, no matter how cute you are, no one wants to see your ass crack.  Paired with the super long t-shirt you get rid of the risk of exposing yourself, but your belly just gets shoved out and even fairly small/fit girls look like they’re rockin’ the beer gut.

5.  Leggings

I wore them once (actually I LIVED in them in the 80s), I don’t plan to wear them again.  Whereas I can get on the skinny jeans train, I just don’t like them with heels.  It’s like wearing a super fancy skirt  and heels with an ironic t-shirt.  Sorry, try again.  I can see maaaaaybe wearing them with the long sweater with boots on top, but it’s almost a little too “pajama” for me.

6.  80’s sunglasses

Kayne, Im’a let you finish, but I think…well, wait, no YOU have the worst sunglasses of all time.  Go ahead, continue on.

That being said – don’t get offended.  I have a girlfriend that rocks the long shirts and they look GREAT on her.  Another one that almost exclusively wears leggings for a night out on the town and is tres fashionable.   It’s all about making it work for you.  But seriously, get thee out shopping.  Unless your closet is as full as mine, and if you can get away, go shopping anyway.  Zliten, you totally did NOT hear that. ::grin::